The Branch Immortal Dynasty (Complete)

[Beks]

43 ~ Weird Things & Destiny

by Wesley Riverhawk

Uh, hi. So I’m a writer by trade…but this is still weird. A lot about my life is weird. I’ll leave my introduction at that.

Here’s weird thing #1. Sandpiper came to me one morning and told me that we needed to take some photos for her museum room. All the dynasty couples do it, apparently.



“Besides, I’ve never used the photo booth,” she said. “It’ll be fun!”
I was a little distracted by her outfit. Who wouldn’t be? “Um…are you supposed to wear your knickers?”
“There’s no rule against it. Hey, you could wear YOUR pajamas!”
“No thanks.”



Weird thing #2: the next dynasty spouse after me was already aging up to child.



Starling brought him to his cake.





Robin got the Loves the Outdoors trait for his birthday. That’s another thing we have in common now.



Weird thing #3 may as well be Sandpiper in general. She was inventing full-time now, and hardly sleeping or eating thanks to her Moodlet Manager. She spent all her time in that studio on the corner of the lot. The rest of us hardly saw her.



She got to experience her first butt fire, though, after years of wishing for it. “It was everything I’d dreamed of and more!” she told me after.



Because she enjoyed fire so much, Sandy decided to install her very own fireplace in the studio so she could bask in the danger at all hours.



Of course, fireplaces come with risks. Naturally, Sandy was more than prepared for this.



I suspected that she was actually a bit nervous underneath her “YAY I LOVE FIRE” exterior. Nobody would want fire spreading to their latest inventions, right?



Shortly after her birthday, Sandy graduated from high school with highest honors. She was Valedictorian as well, and her classmates voted her Most Likely to Save the World. “More like burn it down,” she whispered to me with a gleeful glint in her eye.



Even though we didn’t attend the ceremony at City Hall, Sandpiper still took the time to hang out with the rest of the family in her funny graduation hat. (I personally appreciated that it was a cat hat.)



Arthur created Sandy’s young adult ice sculpture. He’s an old man now, and while he’s still got some time left, I think we’re all aware that this could be the last ice sculpture he ever makes. We’re all hoping he at least makes it to Sandy’s next birthday.



As always, he dances. He’s got the most incredible footwork for a man of 83.



With Sandpiper busy inventing and working on her other requirements, I found myself often in the company of young Robin. He liked to play pretend in my office as I worked on my latest book. He spoke boldly of leading the world and falling in love with princesses.

“Am I going to marry Sandpiper one day?” he asked me once.
“Sandy? Oh, I’m afraid not, Robin. Your princess...hasn’t arrived yet. You’ll meet her one day, don’t worry.”
“When?”
“Well…probably not for a while yet.”



I remembered what it was like to be a lonely child, destined for marriage to some unknown girl who wasn’t even born yet. Robin was a good kid and kept himself busy with skills and school and homework. I spent time with him whenever I could.



My adult birthday snuck up on me. I was surprised when Sandpiper appeared in the room at exactly the right moment, almost as if she knew.

“Happy birthday, handsome!” she said. Weird thing #4. I know we’re supposed to have a child together one day, but…well, best not overthink it.



I grew a mustache. This was the extent of my midlife crisis. I think Sandy’s attentions made me nervous. Or maybe I was trying to impress her? I’m as confused as you are.



I did find that with middle age comes a certain inclination toward naps. I embraced that wholeheartedly.



Meanwhile, Sandy went on inventing, climbing slowly through the levels and adding to her arsenal of ingenious ideas every day.



And I went on writing the stories of the Branches for future generations. There are so many still to tell.


Notes from a watcher who totally ships it
-- I instructed Sandpiper to go and take some photos with Wesley in the photo booth. I did not instruct her to wear her undergarments for the occasion.
-- I also did not instruct her to be the sole attendee of Wesley’s private birthday party.
-- I think Sandpiper might have a crush on Wesley. That's what I'm getting at here.
-- I think Wesley might be okay with it. There might be hope after all.

[Beks]

44 ~ Holy Ground

by Sandpiper Branch

I’m an inventor. And that means I get to do cool, fire-related stuff all the time. Right? WRONG. I wasn’t allowed to blow stuff up until I was level six! Six! It took me like seven whole days as a young adult to get that far!



But then the time came, and I raided the family inventory for random junk to blow up. I lined them up in the backyard and ran for cover.



BOOM! Yeah!



Okay, apparently detonation has a side effect. Of fire. I love fire! But not fire in sacred places. No, ma'am.



Normally I’m the one to put out fires. I am good at fires, being a Daredevil. But this time, the fire was in the immortal museum - a place I’m not allowed to enter until I’ve completed all my requirements. So instead, I just screamed like a banshee. Fortunately Starling was heading down to the museum anyway. She wanders around down there a lot.



By the time Starling got there, the fire had spread. She stood there watching as the flames threatened to melt the dynasty’s first ice sculpture, which had stood there for hundreds of years.



After briefly contemplating the potential devastation of her entire family’s legacy (“I had to pause for dramatic effect!”), Starling got out the fire extinguisher and set to work. By this time, the other immortals had reached the scene, and the fire had spread to Starling’s career rewards and photographs.



It was chaos, apparently, and I really wish I’d been there to see it. Instead, I was standing in my underwear one level above, my hair and skin singed, listening to the distant screams of my ancestors and wondering if they were having fun.



Apparently they weren’t. The fire spread pretty far before Starling managed to put it out. And amazingly, none of the ice sculptures melted! Even so, the Hidden Springs Insurance Company generously granted us 9 simoleons to cover the cost of the damage. Starling was so grateful for this contribution to what would have been a 12,000 simoleon loss, if that first sculpture (created by Ryan Anderson) had been destroyed.

So that was eventful! I bet you’re ready to be done with fires, aren’t you? WELL I’M NOT.



Fires happen all the time in my inventing studio. Probably ‘cause I put a fireplace in there.



Sometimes they even happen when I dip into the main house to grab a snack. This results in my various grandmothers standing outside the door going “What are we supposed to do?!” "Mother, do something!" "I can't, the door is locked!" It’s hilarious!



And yeah, butt fires are just a regular part of my day now. I find them boring, to be honest.



Okay, I guess we can put the fires on pause for a moment. I finally invented a miner, which meant that I could start mining for palladium - very important for the creation of my final invention, which...I have not yet invented yet.



The first hole I dug turned into a magical tunnel. I had a lot more widgets to build that day, so I asked my mother to go down and explore it for me. Maybe she’d find some palladium!



In retrospect I think asking Meadowlark Branch to explore a tunnel might have been a mistake. She survived, though. She’s just a little bit traumatized. No big deal.



So yeah, I lied at the start of this chapter. I got to do all kinds of epic things as an inventor. Sometimes I spent entire days at the junkyard across the road (why has nobody in this family ever been to the junkyard before now?! It’s amazing!), just blowing stuff up and sucking up the scrap with my harvester. I feel like a baddie, which is what I always wanted to become.



I even met two junkyard kitties! Their names were Stray Cat and Stray Cat.



My favorite kinds of explosions are the ones that happen at night. They’re just magical.



And yes, I continued creating huge explosions at the Nest as well. I learned to place my explosions over safe ground, not holy ground. The results were always thrilling.



Sometimes I also got to risk my life a little bit! The occasional electrocution is just part of the job. I really do hope I don’t die, though. I can’t have a death flower until I’m old!



As for the rest of the family? They’re booooring. But Starling adopted a cardinal (which Coconut caught in his mouth, but we don’t talk about that) and named it Cala. This is the first actual bird in this bird dynasty since, like, forever ago. At the moment Cala is the only bird in the aviary, but Starling swears she’s going to get more.



Not from Coconut's mouth, though.



Coconut was a lovely cat and my mother’s lifelong familiar. He will be very missed. Rest in peace, Coconut.



Wesley still went on the occasional date with Amit Suggs, who aged up to elder at some point recently.



Buuuut also Wesley and me are getting along just fine in case you were wondering and sometimes we even cuddle in the hot tub. Ooh, juicy! Okay that’s it for now bye!


Notes from a singed watcher
-- Did you know that detonations can cause fires on floors below? I did not. Now I know. Honestly, the moment when the fire started behind Starling’s very first ice sculpture was a moment of transcendence. I was like, “This could be it. This dynasty could be over right now. And the symbolism could not be more perfect.” Fortunately, as you saw, the fire was actually rather wimpy and did not burn anything except the floor. If it had spread to any of Starling’s paintings…yikes. But we’re fine! It’s fine! Everything’s fine!

[Beks]

45 ~ Gross Grownup Stuff

by Sandpiper Branch

Life went on at the Nest. Robin aged up to teen while playing pretend in Wesley’s office.



His new trait was Family Oriented. This kid is just so darn excited for his future, isn't he?



Wesley hadn’t seen Amit in a while, so he took him on a date to Phil’s Place. Wesley came back looking a little sad. I think he knows that Amit won’t be around much longer.



Age is creeping up on my dad, too. Fortunately he remains as energetic as ever (and as in love with Mom as ever).



About halfway through my young adult stage, I maxed the inventing skill. Somehow I managed to do that without completing any of the skill challenges. Impressive, eh? Thanks, I hate myself too. (Not really. This just means I get to blow up a lot more things! And make like a thousand more widgets. Sigh)



Robin went to prom and was voted prom king. He also acquired a romantic interest, but he wouldn’t tell us anything about them. “It’s not going to last, anyway,” he said. I suppose he was right.



FLOCK has become a full-blown band, except for the fact that nobody ever calls them for gigs. Starling dragged all the immortals out of the house and took them to Starlight Picnic Park For Activities Other Than Picnicking, where they serenaded the locals for hours on end.

I spent that whole day drilling with a miner outside the consignment store. I was trying to create a secret tunnel to connect to one of the holes I’d drilled at the Nest, so that I could travel to the consignment store much quicker. I was so excited to explore underneath the town and have adventures!



After the sun set, I started hearing shouts over the noise of the miner. I looked around and saw several townspeople gathering on the lot. I figured they were angry at the noise, like people usually are. I was getting tired anyway, so I rolled my eyes and packed up the miner. Once the noise died down, I realized that they weren’t shouting at me. And they were looking at the sky. It did seem to have gotten darker all of a sudden…

I wanted to stay and watch, but some uncontrollable impulse drove me to run into the Consignment Store. As soon as I closed the door behind me, I heard the biggest explosion ever - bigger than all my explosions put together! Well, almost.



It was a meteor! I’d heard of these things falling once in a while, but not in Hidden Springs, even in the hundreds of years since Granny Starling was young. It was so epic!



Nobody was hurt in the crash, thankfully. We just all got a bit singed. I was used to being singed, so it didn’t bother me. A couple of the witnesses came inside to clean up just as I was leaving. One of them said I was smart to run inside. I just stuck my tongue out at him because at least HE got to see the explosion UP CLOSE!



Then I went outside and saw the meteor itself, which had implanted itself in a giant hole in the ground. I wondered if I could suck it up with my harvester. What do you think? Was it possible? Um, spoiler alert, IT TOTALLY WAS. That big rock was worth over 3,000 simoleons! All in all, a very exciting day.

The day before my dad turned 90, he approached me in the kitchen for a chat.



“So, my little Sandpiper! How goes the inventing? The romance? The life?”
“Oh, it’s all going great, Dad! I’m making good progress on my requirements, and I think Wesley and I are moving in a good direction!”



“That’s wonderful, Piper. As for Wesley, well, he’s what I wanted to talk to you about. You see…I’ve been holding onto a wish ever since you became a young adult. It’s a wish to see you get married, kiddo.”
“Oh! I hope to marry Wesley eventually, Dad, but…I don’t know if he’s ready yet. He’s still with Amit.”
“But what about you, Piper? I’ve seen how you act around your man. You’re positively smitten!”
“Well…yeah. Yeah, I guess I am. I keeping rolling the wish to skinny dip with him…”



“Here’s the thing, Piper. Obviously this is a shared decision between the two of you. But while you might have all eternity to do the things that you want, life is short for the rest of us. If you’re ready to take the next step, it’s all right to tell Wesley that. He might be readier than you think. Also I’m almost 90 and I might die before you get married at this rate.”
“What was that last bit?”
“Hmm? Oh, nothing!”



“Okay, Dad I’ll think about it. But what about Amit?”
“Sometimes we have to take things into our own hands to create the life we want.”
“Wait...re you suggesting I detonate him or something?!?”
“Of course not! Just…talk to Wesley. That’s all I’m suggesting.”



“Thanks, Dad. I love you.”
“I love you too, Piper.”

I headed across the lot to my inventing studio, deep in thought. I knew that Dad might not be around for much longer. I knew that Wesley was still involved with Amit. I knew that I’d been pining for Wesley for years, even though I tried to resist it. And I knew that the only way to think things through was to bang out a few widgets in my private studio.

So I was a little bit startled to find Wesley waiting for me.



“Uh…hi. No one’s ever been in here before, besides me.”
“Yeah, sorry. I figured you wouldn’t mind me, a mortal, sneaking in. I have something important to talk to you about.”
“Oh?”



“Yeah. I’ve ended things with Amit.”
“What?! When?”
“At the bistro yesterday. I figured…it was time.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, really. He was upset but I think he understood that I have duties here that are more important.”



“Well, I wanted to talk to you too,” I said, rushing through the words. “I just spoke to my dad, and also I’ve been thinking for a while, and…maybe we should…you know, move forward with things. I know you still care for Amit, and I’m a lot younger than you, and some of this is because my dad might die soon, and it’s all really sudden and kind of strange...but I’m ready to move forward and I was wondering if you are too.”

We talked for quite a while that evening. We both admitted that we’d been rolling wishes for each other for a while but had been too afraid to do anything about it (and me being a Daredevil! For shame!).



And eventually, we came to an agreement that moving forward seemed like the right thing to do. Also we may or may not have kissed a bit but that's gross and unimportant.



So I proposed! “Hey Wesley, do you want this ring I made out of scrap metal?”
“Yes. Yes I do.”



“I love you, Wesley.”
“I love you too, Sandygirl.”

Okay, that’s enough gross grownup stuff. Next time, more gross grownup stuff!


Notes from a pleasantly surprised watcher
-- Of all the Branches, Sandpiper is absolutely the #1 Sim I would have chosen to experience a meteor strike. I would have loved to keep her right there in the action to see the explosion close up, but for obvious reasons I couldn’t risk her dying. I had her duck inside the Consignment Store for safety. She really didn’t get to enjoy the adrenaline rush at all. Sorry, Sandy.
-- I was fully expecting Sandpiper and Wesley to remain a platonic couple. But shortly after she became a young adult, Sandy started rolling wishes for Wesley - mostly, um, physical in nature. (She jumped right over the “Kiss Wesley” wish and went straight for “Woohoo with Wesley”!)  In time, Wesley started rolling wishes too (though more gentlemanly - he mostly just wished to go on dates with her). I’m sorry for the loss of Amit, but I’m also so pleased that things have worked out romantically between Sandy and her intended spouse.
-- Robin’s romantic interest at prom was a boy named Manuel Washburn. Yep, we have another not-straight Sim in the family. I’m starting to wonder if there’s some sort of town-wide bug that’s affecting the sexualities of all recently-born Sims. I’ve noticed mixed attractions happening with new visitors to the house, also - for instance, service Sims will express attraction for both the male and female members of the family. It’s quite bizarre.
-- Sandpiper has an odd glitch I’ve never seen before: she seems to be incapable of traveling to other lots in any vehicle other than a taxi. She has half a dozen sports cars, a motorcycle, and two Motive Mobiles on the lot to choose from, but she never uses any of them when I send her somewhere. Hence the attempted consignment store tunnel that resulted in a meteor. (Update from the future: Since writing this, Sandpiper has started taking non-taxi vehicles about 50% of the time. She still refuses to take the Motive Mobile by herself, though. She’ll only use it if she’s wrangled in with a group.)
-- Arthur might be just about the happiest and most energetic elder I’ve ever played, and this is in spite of the fact that his education career has been bugged for ages now and he’s been stuck at level 9 since his birthday. (His job performance is suffering because the “Give Lectures” work tone doesn’t register correctly, no matter how many shifts he spends actually giving lectures.) He also seems to be stuck in terms of skilling; his logic and charisma skills haven’t progressed despite a lot of chess and social interactions. Looks like our Arthur is destined to be Principal forever. At least he seems happy with his lot in life. If nothing else, he’s always down to dance.

[Beks]

46 ~ Mean Cat Saves The Day

by Sandpiper Branch

After Wesley and I got engaged, Wesley thought it would be fun to ask my father for my hand. I was like, “What is this, medieval times?” and Wesley was like, “We’re sort of in an alternate timeline, if you think about it,” and I was like, “Never mind. Go for it if you want.”

He did want. And they were both so ridiculous about it, too.



“Oh great father of the Branch household, will you give a poor novelist permission to wed your only daughter?”
“Gosh, I’ll have to think about it. This is very unexpected, you know.”
“I understand, good sir. I must emphasize how passionate my love is, and also how old I am getting.”
“You’re not old yet, son. You don’t know what old is.”



“Oh my gosh! You called me ‘son’! Does this mean you bestow upon us your blessing?!”



“Ah, what the heck. Welcome to the family, stranger!”



Men are weird sometimes.



Well, we got married! Kind of in the dark, by accident. We invited some old friends over and utilized the old wedding arch that hadn’t been used in ages.



Gross grownup things...



More gross grownup things...



...okay, finally! Congratulations to us!



Then it was time for...surprise! Even more gross grownup stuff. I guess Madeline Moore is into that kind of thing. We had to tell her to take her and her bikini-clad bod off of the lot, please and thank you.



Then it was time to fulfill that woohoo wish I'd had for ages. Booyeah!



The excitement wasn’t over, though. No wedding is complete without the death of a paparazzi on your home lot! Or without some late-night detonation.



And also some early morning detonation! Hahahahaaaa!



At this point, we all sort of settled into a period of waiting. My mother met up with her old friend Shanta Norris, who, in spite of being a fairy, was probably going to die soon. (She did die, the next day.)



We also adopted a dog, Mallard. I was starting to worry about being able to find a pink diamond to make my master invention. We hadn’t found one using the miner yet, or even with the collection helper. So we got a dog to do some hunting for us. Mallard was already an elder when we got him, but he learned hunting quickly and tried his best to dig up some gems for us.



My dad had been stuck at level 9 of the education career for a while, but somehow his progress bar started moving again after he turned 90. He got promoted to District Superintendent! We were all so proud of him!



When he got home that day, he decided to retire. My family members celebrated with some yeti posters because...never mind, I have no idea why!



We weren’t in this waiting period for very long. At age 93, my father climbed out of the bathtub and started feeling light.



He couldn’t have picked a worse spot to die, really. Poor Mom was stuck on the far side of the kitchen and couldn’t get into the bathroom to see her husband pass away!



Grim eventually got things sorted out, though. Mom watched silently as Dad begged for his life. Alas, death is final, as we all know.

OR IS IT?



In this case, it was not final. You know Douglas Fur, the rather nasty cat who goes around attacking everyone in the house all day long? He saved Dad! We didn’t even think he liked my Dad! Before we even knew what was happening, Grim announced that Dad had been saved and disappeared into the ether!



Mom was still sobbing when Dad returned to his corporeal form.



“Guess what? I’m back, baby.”
“Oh, I’m so glad, Arthur. Also, I think I’m having a panic attack.”
“I don’t blame you.”



Yes, this innocent little stinker saved my father from death and threw our whole dynasty into jeopardy. I don’t know what he was thinking. Was it intentional? Did he just want to stress us all out? Or did he do it out of the goodness of his mean little heart, knowing how much we loved Dad?



Here’s proof that he’s still a mean cat through and through. See, he went right back to attacking the man he saved! What a weirdo. Ah well - in any case, Arthur Vanderburg is back for another day!


Notes from a very, very stressed watcher
-- DOUGLAS FUR, HOW COULD YOU! What an ordeal, man. How many times have I forgotten that pets can save their owners? Too many. It catches me off guard EVERY TIME. And I especially wouldn’t have expected it of Douglas Fur, the meanest cat I’ve ever played! I wondered if he and Arthur had somehow become friends before this happened…nope! They were enemies. Thanks, Douglas Fur. You might have ruined this dynasty. Much appreciated!
-- At this point, Arthur needs to die again within about three Sim weeks. After that, Wesley could die of old age, and Sandpiper will age up to elder. I was so ready to move on to the next generation, and so relieved when Arthur died at 93 (as much as I adore him). NOT SO ANYMORE. Back to the waiting game!

[Beks]

47 ~ The Best Funeral Ever

by Arthur Branch

Hey, Arthur here! I bet you didn’t expect to hear from me again, did you? Yeah, I’m super old now!



So after the cat saved me from death by old age, I felt the need to do something fun. Something to bring us all back from the brink of grief. Plus, I had no idea when I’d be dying again, so time was of the essence.

I didn’t have to think about it long. What’s my favorite thing to do in the world? Party, of course!

Have you ever thrown a funeral for yourself? I’ve gotta say, it’s interesting. Actually it’s exactly like any other party. Which I was mighty relieved about!



There were arguments and fights! Mostly between Starling and Gary Shue. I don’t know what that drama’s about, but I never say no to a good dance floor shouting match.



I danced with many wonderful folk, including many fairies.



Chickadee manned the bar, as usual. She can make some decent party drinks, and she loves to brag about that fact.



Sandpiper had an oddly sensual-looking dance moment with Felix Vanderburg, another family friend who’s been around for centuries.



We even had a protest happen in the middle of the party! That was courtesy of Christy Carlisle, who sets up protests everywhere she goes. I stood in the center of the crowd and just basked in the chaos.



Hope Boyles: “This is the best funeral ever!”

I have to agree. It was a rager, this one.



Sandpiper finished out the evening by dragging all of us into a game of tag. I’m going to miss these games when I’m gone for real.



The next day was Robin’s birthday. He’d had a pretty uneventful teenhood and was excited to start adult life.



And he’d been working out! Look at those muscles! Charles Winterly who?!



Robin chopped his hair short and cleaned up very nicely. His new trait: No Sense of Humor. Now that’s a new one we haven’t had in this family before.



I did my best to relax and enjoy what were probably going to be my final days alive. My daughter is always supportive of my…bolder activities (even if she appropriately stands many yards away during some of them).



It made me so happy to see her and Wesley together. I was sad that I would never get to meet my grandchild, but at least I knew these two would make A+ parents.



Robin graduated from high school as Valedictorian, just like Sandpiper, and was voted Most Likely to Have a Big Family.



Yes, things were good and calm at the Nest these days.



Well, some of the time.



This scene is a great example of a typical day at the Nest, at least while Sandpiper is the active heir. Lots of fire, lots of noise, a little magic, lots of screaming, lots of scrap. It’s pretty heartwarming to see Sandpiper having so much fun with her requirements. (It’s also somewhat heartwarming in the literal sense, if you get too close to the action.)



Her adult birthday snuck up on her, and on all of us. I would have loved to throw her a party, but she didn’t even remember that it was her birthday that day. Ah, well.



With Sandpiper’s elderhood just a few short weeks away, the family started putting more time into helping her with her requirements. Specifically, she really needed to find a pink diamond, as well as some palladium, to craft her final invention. Mallard had been hunting for days without success, and the miner hadn’t turned up anything yet. So my beautiful Meadowlark started casting conversion rituals on the other collectibles we had lying around. For hours and hours on end, she transformed seeds into metals and fish into gemstones.



Two elder birthdays happened. First was Douglas Fur, whose paws sank several inches into the carpet for the occasion.



Next was Wesley. Wasn’t he a young boy just yesterday? Well, my sense of time is screwed up. I was dead for a second, you know. And I probably will be again soon. But in the meantime…I’m living my best life.


Notes from an impatient watcher
-- I’d never thrown a funeral party in this game before. The only difference I noticed was the option to “express condolences” to other members of the family, which had the same exact animation as the “console” interaction. Not that exciting. But honestly, Arthur having a dance-filled funeral was preferable anyway.
-- I've been keeping my eye on Gary Shue for this whole dynasty, because he's one of the last remaining original townies. (He might come in handy later on, if ya know what I'm sayin'.) So I think it's hilarious that he and Starling seem to hate each other's guts. They've been flirty on and off in the past, and we all know Starling loves her dramatic uncalled-for romances. Maybe at this point they're just sick of seeing each other around town for hundreds of years. Who knows!
-- Finding a pink diamond has proved to be one of the biggest challenges of this whole dynasty so far. Mallard’s hunting was slow and frustrating (I’m guessing being an elder was slowing him down); the miner turned up a few rare-ish gems, but nothing very impressive; and I’m pretty sure Meadowlark performed a few hundred conversion rituals by this point. Waiting for Arthur to die again, and waiting for a pink diamond to appear, was a pretty stressful combo.
-- However, having Meadowlark do a million conversion rituals did have its fun moments. My favorite items to appear via conversion: tofu; horse granola; a single marshmallow; a donut; a crocodile named Leslie; and this spaceship cookie, which I have never seen or heard of before:



It’s so cute! I have no idea where it’s from! It’s now in a chest at the Nest and will be staying there forever and ever!

[Beks]

48 ~ Old Man Lunch

by Sandpiper Branch

Mallard passed away in rather pathetic circumstances - at the junkyard, in the middle of the night, with no family nearby to mourn him as he went. We all felt terrible that he had to die alone, but we were grateful for all that he did for us.



Rest in peace, Mallard. May you find many pink diamonds in dog heaven. Or whatever collectibles you want. Or maybe no collectibles. Maybe you just want to take a nap in dog heaven. That sounds good.



Douglas Fur lived on, of course, and continued being his sassy, quietly rebellious self.



And my dad did too! He spent long days on his own personal dance floor, and in rocking chairs, and wherever he wanted to be.



He also did my adult sculpture. I didn’t think my dad would be around for this, but he was, and I felt so lucky.



We were all still looking for a pink diamond. We even got a claw machine, because somebody heard a rumor that sometimes pink diamonds turn up as prizes. My dad was more than happy to test this theory (without success). No pink diamond yet, but we now have enough toys for the next seventy-seven babies to be born in this dynasty!



When several days passed and no one found a pink diamond, we decided to adopt another dog - a younger one this time, who could hunt faster and longer. This beautiful girl is Swanilda.



Swanilda was a sweet dog, and she even got her relationship with Douglas Fur slightly into the green, which is unheard of unless you’re Wesley (who’s a Cat Person). Probably because they bonded over their mutual hatred of…birds? Oh, dear. That’s just not a good sign in this dynasty.



Robin had joined the Law Enforcement career and was moving up quickly through the ranks. He reached level 5 well before his adult birthday and started driving a cop car everywhere. So cool!

He started doing reports, too. He enjoyed talking to people that had known our family for a long time.



“So, Felix, what gossip can you share with me from the last few hundred years?”
“I used to date Goldfinch’s sister. She was incredible, the most insane and fun-loving Sim imaginable. Legend says she was born between a dead fish and a pile of cat vomit…”
“Really? That sounds suspicious.”



Mom took over mining duties since she didn’t have much else to do. I think the noise rattled her a bit, but she did it anyway. Thanks Mom!



And me? I was still working hard on my supermax. I finally made my 100th big invention and 250th widget, which meant that I could start focusing on my career more. Everyone knows that time machines sell for a crazy amount of money!

Time passed. We were all happy to have Dad around for so long…but we were also starting to worry. My husband was already an old man, and I was going to be old myself before too long. We still needed to bring in the next generation! Wesley and I both held wishes to have our first child, but we couldn’t do so until a certain sad event happened for a second time.



After a while, Wesley and my father were both feeling antsy. Wesley suggested they go out to Phil’s Place for lunch. “An old man lunch!” he said, which of course my dad was on board for.



They got ceviche and shawarma and settled down to eat. At different tables. Because of course. Then Dad went back in for drinks while Wesley read a book.



When Dad came out and headed for the car to head home, he started to feel strangely light.



My father, Arthur Vanderburg, died of old age for a second time at the age of 108. As heartbroken as we all were, it was time. Rest in peace, Dad. You were the best father and the best partier of all time.



I knew as soon as it happened. I just felt it, like a weird ache. I stopped working and took a moment to catch my breath. “Oh, Dad,” I whispered. "Douglas Fur didn't ruin the dynasty after all!"



Wesley drove home alone from his old man lunch. He told me afterward that he’d never felt so sad and so elated at the same time, and that he hoped he’d never have to feel that way again because it was extremely confusing.



I met him on the lawn, and I could see in his eyes exactly what he was thinking.



“Wesley…I’m devastated, but…do you know what this means?!?”
“That I do, Sandygirl. That I do.”



It was time for gross grownup stuff, that’s what!



The next day, I discovered that I was pregnant! Generation six was officially on the way, and I still had a whole week till my elder birthday!



We were so excited about the new baby. Wesley in particular couldn’t wait to meet his child.



And he was so good to me throughout my pregnancy, too. He even played tag with me and let me win, even though I was just waddling all over the place!



Mom was starting to worry us, though. After Dad died for real, she had to spend some time in the locked flat upstairs so she wouldn’t cause mischief. She started casting spells on herself, impulsively cooking waffles, and getting into arguments with her fellow immortals. We all hoped that the baby’s arrival would calm her down. It’s going to be okay, Mom! Oh, gosh, I’m about to be a mom…


Notes from an agonized watcher
-- Every Immortal Dynasty comes with challenges, scares, and frustrations. I had a lot of them going on at once during this era of the dynasty. Waiting for Arthur to die + waiting for a pink diamond (and trying many different methods of finding one) + waiting for a palladium (Swanilda found one on her first day of hunting, thank God) + waiting for a new generation after being stuck on the same one for so long = a very stressed and impatient Beks. I was starting to lose hope that Arthur would ever die and wondering if I would have to cheat his death to keep the story going (and thus disqualify myself from the HoF). Turns out all he needed was to go out for a nice lunch on the town, and then he was happy to bite the dust. Phew! When he died, he was 108, Sandpiper had 11 days left till her elder birthday, and Wesley was 82. Arthur’s electronica music will continue to play in the party room forevermore. RIP, my dude.
-- One of the big events of this chapter was going to be the detonation of the airplane statue, which I purchased and placed on the home lot (the military base in Hidden Springs doesn’t have one). However, the explosion it created was so small and quick that I didn’t even get a screenshot of it. Poor Sandpiper was so disappointed. But hey, it gave her over 800 scrap!

[Beks]

49 ~ Pink Diamonds & Neon Lights

by Sandpiper Branch

My mother and grandmothers all insisted that I take it easy during my pregnancy. “After all, you’re almost an old lady,” Starling kept reminding me. And Mother kept reminding me that in order for my child to be born with the correct traits, I needed to take good care of myself and have a stress-free birth.



So I did a lot of sitting. I didn’t enjoy it very much. I was used to being at my workbench all day and all night, using the Moodlet Manager anytime I got hungry or tired. I had hardly even been inside the upstairs lounge before. At least there were rocking chairs, which are slightly more fun than regular chairs.



I kept inventing, though, because I still had a lot of work to do before I could become immortal. The labor pains hit while I was in the middle of a widget. Stress-free birth, Mom? You of all people should know that that's impossible!



Wesley took me to the hospital, and just before midnight, I came out with a baby girl in my arms. Everybody, meet Sparrow, the long-awaited sixth heir of the Branch family!

Thank goodness Sparrow arrived when she did. My mom was starting to go crazy, having just lost Arthur and all. She’d been locked in the flat upstairs due to some flirtatious interactions she’d attempted with certain other male members of the family. This was very out of character for her, so locking her up for a while seemed safe. Of course, her roommates weren’t immune to her out-of-character-ness. She even turned Chickadee into a toad one night!



Meadowlark: “So you see, Mother, I am a very powerful witch, and thus I am perfectly capable of handling anything life throws at me! I don’t need Arthur! Not when I can turn people into toads!”
Chickadee: “Sweetheart, you’re scaring me with that kind of talk. Also, you need to turn me back into a human immediately. Toadism is forbidden in immortal dynasties.”



A quick sunlight charm fixed that problem. Then the door to the upstairs apartment was found suddenly unlocked. Everyone needed to meet the new baby, after all!



Wesley was more smitten than anyone. He knew he didn’t have much time to spend with his daughter, so he cuddled her as much as he could.



Robin was quite taken with the baby, too. How could he not be?



Another exciting thing happened right around the time of Sparrow’s birth - Swanilda, our faithful hunting dog, finally found a pink diamond! The gem was given right to Starling, who set about analyzing it in order to clone it. Of course she decided to do her analysis in the garden. Under the sprinklers. In the middle of the night.



She successfully cloned the pink diamond, just as she'd cloned so many humans and plasma bugs. Science is crazy! By the end of that day, we had three pink diamonds ready to go.



Goldfinch, our resident gem cutting expert, took care of the heart-shaped cuts.



I took the precious diamonds and the palladium we’d stored in a chest, and I returned to my workbench. Starling also gave me a handful of life fruit, making me swear on my favorite widget not to eat them. I widget-swore and I got to work.



About a day later, I finished my master invention - my very first SimBot! His name was Donte and he stood before me in my workshop for exactly two seconds before vanishing into the ether. I know SimBots aren’t allowed in dynasty households, but dang, I would’ve at least liked a quick chat!



Sparrow’s first birthday arrived, and we all cheered over her first cake in the creepy light of a full moon.



Wow, some genes are really strong in this family! Sparrow aged up looking a lot like me, and therefore a lot like Meadowlark. Her first traits were Brave and Athletic, and her favorite things are Hip Hop music, Tri-Tip Steak, and the color orange (which of course means nothing because it’s not her bird color).

With my elder birthday just a few days away, I was racing against the clock to finish my requirements. (My mother held the record for fastest requirement completion. I was determined to finish even faster! Even though my requirements were quite a bit harder…)



For my property upgrade, I chose to buy Redwood Heights Luxury Lodge and turn part of it into a crazy colorful arcade! I renamed the place Piper’s Pink Arcade because I am very creative. I decked it out in sort of a retro neon style and put in lots of games and activities. My goal was to make my neurotic mother nervous, and to make my proper and artistic great-grandmother want to scratch her eyes out. I think I succeeded.



I had to make two more SimBots to complete my Lifetime Wish. My second SimBot, Krista, was VERY excited to discover that she’d been created by a celebrity. Then she, too, disappeared into thin air before I could say “Hi, what’s it like to be a sentient pile of scrap?”



I spent as much time with Sparrow as I could, but the reality was that I didn’t have a lot of free time in those days. Trying to max the inventor career and blow up enough stuff and make more SimBots and get six people to like me was taking up every minute of my time!



The good result of that was that Sparrow got to spend more time with her daddy, who taught her to walk. She'll be doing much more than that before long!



Chickadee helped with the talking part. She knows a lot of big vocabulary words and was very eager to teach Sparrow how to, like, name all the bones in the body or whatever. (I think Sparrow preferred the walking lessons.)



Robin helped out a lot, too. One day, he would be more than just a friend and caretaker to Sparrow. But we don’t think about that yet!



I finally created my third SimBot and completed my Lifetime Wish. Reynaldo couldn’t stay in the household either, of course, but I was happy to meet him. And this meant that I was closer to immortality than ever!



Since I’d hit that milestone, I decided to take a few hours off and take Wesley on a date to the new arcade. We boogied down to disco music and had a great time.



And these arcade games? So worth the headache you get from all the clashing colors and neon lights around you!



We even made use of one of the bedrooms on the second floor of the lodge, because life is short and why the heck not.



Later that night, I finally completed my 150th detonation at Meadow Beach. All I had left to do now was become an elder, get my museum pieces done, and get one last promotion. Oh, and make six best friends among the residents of Hidden Springs, most of whom are eternally mad at me for the constant explosions I create. No problemo!


Notes from a watcher 90s kid
-- The genetics in this family have been baffling to me. Most heirs in this dynasty so far have turned out strongly resembling their mothers - only Chickadee and Meadowlark inherited noticeable features from their fathers (or grandfathers, in Chickadee’s case). I do think Sparrow is less of a Meadowlark clone than Sandpiper, but it’s hard to tell just yet. Those Nali genes are wild, man!
-- I am aware that sparrows are not purple. If you like, you may join me in pretending they are, just like we pretended sandpipers are pink and meadowlarks are green.
-- Can you tell that I recently bought the 70s, 80s, and 90s stuff pack and am having way too much fun with it? Yeah. In addition to the retro-themed arcade, I also designed Sandpiper’s last detonation to be retro-themed. I placed a bunch of those big 80s boomboxes in a row at Meadow Beach and turned them all on to the disco station, then had Sandpiper blow them up like dominoes. The chain reaction was a little underwhelming, but it was cool to have disco music thumping throughout the event (and then fade to nothing after the last explosion).

[Beks]

50 ~ You Made My Heart Explode

by Sandpiper Branch

Sparrow’s toddler years were probably the happiest of my whole life. I mean, I REALLY love blowing stuff up. But even that never quite beat having these two as my family.



Sparrow was an adorable little girl. So adorable we kind of took way too many pictures of her.



No one is sorry. We waited a long time for her, okay? She’s worth the attention!



Here, enjoy some more Sparrow spam.



Here she is getting to know Swanilda!



Here she is nuzzling her daddy! Oh wait, that’s Douglas Fur. We’re all still mad at Douglas Fur. Moving on!



Outside of Sparrow being cute, though, plenty of other cool things were happening. For instance, Wesley finished writing his masterpiece! Apparently that’s a really big deal and a lot of Sims die before they do it. Not my Wesley! He put his masterpiece with all his other published books - on a secret shelf upstairs somewhere. I literally don’t know where it is. Because it’s a secret and he won’t tell me. He’s just like, “These books are not for you.” And that’s that, apparently.



Robin aged up to an adult while wearing this hilarious work uniform. I was cracking up and he was like, “I’m a secret agent! It’s a disguise!” and I was like, “Sure you are. Sure it is.”



One of my last requirements was to get six best friends. Because I’m both Childish and brilliant, I invited some acquaintances to meet me at Starlight Picnic Park For Activities Other Than Picnicking, where we would play tag for several hours and all become BFFs. Including my son and very first SimBot, Donte. He showed up…um…like this. In human form. Except he could still rocket around using the jet blasters I installed in his legs. And he still walked around like a SimBot. Perhaps I’m more brilliant than I thought!

I finished collecting my best friends the day of my elder birthday. I insisted on not having cake, because I wanted my youth to last as long as possible.



Wesley was there to watch me age up. He assured me that I’d still be beautiful once I became old.

I appreciated the sentiment, but I also needed to sprint to the mirror ASAP. Just as I whirled around to do exactly that…I heard Wesley calling my name.



“Wait, Sandy…don’t go just yet…”



“Wesley, NO!”
“It’s all right, Sandygirl. I waited as long as I could. It’s time.”



I still insist that it wasn’t. Wesley was only 94 when Grim came for him. Oh, why couldn’t he have lived to be a million? Rest in peace, Wesley Riverhawk. Thank you for your books, your genes, and your tolerance of my detonations. You made my heart explode in the best way possible.



There was nothing left to do but push on with my requirements. My mother took me to her sculpting studio and sculpted me in solemn silence.



Then I went back to my workbench. I still had one more career level to achieve. For once, the methodical work of assembling things I’d made a thousand times was comforting. I didn’t even feel like detonating anything. Except maybe the world.



Somebody else died soon after: Douglas Fur. Honestly, after living with such a mean cat for so long, I don’t think any of us were that sad to see him go. In fact, I caught my mother laughing over the whole thing. You would think my mother would resent Douglas Fur the least, considering he saved her husband from an earlier demise!



Well, whatever the case…farewell, Douglas Fur. We will all remember you via the scars on our ankles from all the times you attacked us for no reason. And thanks for giving me an extra long time with my dad even though it stressed me the heck out and almost ended the dynasty. Rest in peace.



Wesley missed his daughter’s birthday by one day. I tried not to think about that too much as we brought little Sparrow to her cake.







As soon as she grew into a child, Sparrow seemed to know that she was special. She stepped right into the role of Heir To Immortal Dynasty, complete with tiara and strong personality. Our girl was now a Snob!

It had been an eventful couple of days. After that, I settled into my inventing and took many trips to the consignment store. Just a few days later, my last few consignments sold off - and I became a Fourth Dimensional Architect. Goldfinch painted my portrait and snapped a photo, and just like that, I was ready for ambrosia.



My ancestors led me on that bicker-filled procession down into the Workshop of Wonders, as I’m calling it.

“So, Sandpiper! Welcome to the Crazy Old Lady Cave,” said my mother.
“Actually it's the Longevity Laboratory,” said my grandmother.
“Whatever,” I said. "Can we just get down there please?"



When we reached the replicator, I took a moment to admire it and wonder how it worked. I knew some sort of magic was involved, but I couldn’t help but wonder if I was capable of inventing something so snazzy.



Then the five of us sat down to share in a very sparkly meal together.



To me, ambrosia tasted like fire - the luminosity and crackle of it, and also the unpredictability and terror it held. I tasted an adrenaline rush, and the thrill of a mechanical puzzle, and the grease and sweat of hard work and well-loved tools. I felt myself filling up with the rewards of a long life of effort. It felt a little bit like an explosion in my soul. And when the sparkles faded…I was finally immortal.


Fifth Immortal: Sandpiper Branch

“Rather than nesting on the ground like a normal sandpiper, this turd lays its eggs in old songbird nests up in the trees. Freaking weirdo.” --The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America (edited)

Traits: Eccentric, Artistic, Daredevil, Childish, Born Saleswoman
Supermax Skill: Inventing
Other maxed skills:
Career: Inventor
LTW: Monster Maker
BlackOps: A Fishy Science Project, Allow Me To Introduce Myself, Just Business, Construction Equipment Needed, Master Invention, Harvester Delivery
LTRs: Fast Metabolism, Efficient Inventor, Hover Bed
Best Friends: Meadowlark Branch, Adan Crow, Hope Boyles, Latosha Mauldin, Shanda Day, Donte Branch (SimBot)
Building: Sandy’s Theatrical Emporium (Theatre)
Property: Piper’s Pink Arcade (Redwood Heights Luxury Lodge)
Immortal at: 76 days (week 32, day 6)

[ragz1332]

Quite a funny story you got there! Haven’t finished to read it yet, will do over the next few days. Quick technical question: who many people did you actually invite into the household at the beginning? 3?

[Beks]

Quite a funny story you got there! Haven’t finished to read it yet, will do over the next few days. Quick technical question: who many people did you actually invite into the household at the beginning? 3?

Thank you so much! I'm thrilled to have a new reader Yes, 3 people joined at the start: Ryan Anderson, Kyle Anderson, and Emmaline Rhoen. Then I invited Charles Winterly to join a couple weeks later.

[Auranaris]

Congratulations on your 5th Immortal!

[TaurusC]

I started reading this since last year. I really, really love your story! Most of chapters made me laugh even on my bad days. I can't wait to read more chapters.

[Beks]

Congratulations on your 5th Immortal!

Thanks! This was the toughest one yet!

I started reading this since last year. I really, really love your story! Most of chapters made me laugh even on my bad days. I can't wait to read more chapters.

Thank you so much for your kind comment! I'm so happy I could make you laugh a little bit. More chapters coming right up!

[Beks]

51 ~ Queen

by Sparrow Branch

Citizens! It is I, Queen Sparrow. Welcome to my part of the story, also known as the best part.



I spent most of my childhood practicing being queen. Robin was my favorite subject. He would blubber and beg like a true peasant beneath my mighty scepter! However, he also kept calling me Princess Sparrow instead of Queen Sparrow, which is obviously a crime that results in having to wash the dishes. He washed a lot of dishes for me. Let’s just say that.



Robin wasn’t exactly a real peasant, though. Actually he was an International Super Spy. He was such a good spy that he made everybody at his work think he was an astronaut! I’m going to marry Robin someday, so I’m glad he’s made something rather impressive of himself.



I also practiced selling baked goods, for no other reason than wanting to see if I could do it. Osvaldo Haines was my only customer, actually. And he said he couldn’t buy anything because he was on a diet. I let it slide, because I understand the need to maintain one’s figure.



For instance, I will be appearing in many paintings, sculptures, and photographs throughout my life. I always try to look as gorgeous as possible. These things are going to be around forever, after all!



My other favorite subject was Swanilda, our dog. I kept trying to teach her new games but she wasn’t very good at obeying me.



For some reason she was better at obeying Granny Starling, or at least going on walks with her.



Maybe because she got old, and Granny Starling was already super old, so they, like, got each other or whatever.



There are a lot of old people around here. They like to squeeze my cheeks. I can see why, but I still don’t like it.



Before my birthday, I made sure that Great-Great-Grandmother Goldfinch painted a beautiful portrait of me. She said I looked like a little angel in this painting, and I was like, “Well, that's because I am an angel.”



My birthday finally came. I was so excited, and also nervous. My mom told me that sometimes people age up looking crazy with weird hair and ugly clothes. I would rather die than have that happen to me!



I was extra stressed because only two people came downstairs to clap for me when I blew out my birthday candles. Great-Grandma Chickadee said that all the other grannies were locked away in their studios and workshops. I insisted on knowing why they weren’t there to celebrate me, and she said they had all been acting irresponsible and tiresome lately so they had to take time-outs. I told her a birthday ceremony about me would’ve done them good. She rolled her eyes. I think Great-Grandma Chickadee is hard to please.



Oh, well. Even with only two audience members, I felt confident that I would grow up beautiful.



Agh, no! To the mirror! To the mirror at once!



Much better. There is nothing a little makeup and a good hairstyle can’t fix. (Not to mention a certain natural beauty, which I also have.) Now I’m not just an Athletic and Brave Snob - I’m also Dramatic.



It was portrait time again, and even though my childhood portrait was very nice, I wanted to be absolutely sure that my teenage one would be perfect. So I ordered Goldfinch to make me several. I can’t believe none of my ancestors made her do this many. It’s much better to have options!



Well, whatever the portrait shows, I know what I see in the mirror, and it is good.

As soon as I became a teenager, I ran to talk to Robin.



“Hey Robin,” I said. “Guess what. I’m a teenager now.”
“Yes,” he said. “I’m aware.”



“Soon I’ll be old enough to marry you,” I said with my best smile.
“But not yet,” he said seriously. “Congratulations on the birthday.” He patted my arm and walked away.

I think he’s playing hard to get. Or maybe he just has no sense of humor. Oh wait...he does have No Sense of Humor.



Grandmother Meadowlark made my ice sculpture next. Oh, I do love being sculpted. I kept sneaking glances at the sculpture as it was created. It was just so lovely to look at!



Later that same day, Robin found me again and told me he had a surprise for me.

“I was going to save this for your young adult birthday, but maybe it’s better if I show you now.”
“Oh, I quite agree. I’m quite mature for my age, you know.”
“...uh huh.”



He led me upstairs, where he started climbing a spiral staircase that I’d actually never noticed before. How could I have walked past that bathroom door a hundred times and never noticed that there was another level above it? Well, Chickadee's the genius in the family, not me.

I followed Robin up to the secret third floor. There were two locked doors off a small landing.



“Well, here you go,” Robin said, and he turned to go back downstairs. “That door on the left leads to your surprise. Have fun.”
“Wait!” I shouted. “I can’t get into the room, for some reason!”
“I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”
“Robin, WAIT! You mustn’t leave a queen unattended!”

He did. He left a queen unattended. The nerve! Eventually the door magically became unlocked, and I was able to walk through it. I was insulted that the universe evidently did not view me as deserving of entrance to such a room, at least until my repeated stamping and yelling brought the problem to someone’s attention. Ugh!



When I stepped inside, I found a small room, a single window, and…workout equipment! My very own treadmill! Ah, I had already suspected that teenagerhood was going to test my patience and try my nerves. I probably would have gone insane like Starling without the ability to work out. I was saved! Perhaps Robin will make an acceptable king consort one day.

[Beks]

52 ~ What a Rush

by Sparrow Branch

Robin and I had lots of fun working out together. I wasn’t even that embarrassed when I fell down a few times, even though Robin is at like level 7 athletic or something. I think Robin is the only person I don’t mind falling down in front of. He just doesn’t make a big deal out of it. I know I’m Dramatic, but athleticism is very important to me, and I'm trying not to be too dramatic about it. It's my whole life's focus, after all! I need to become a pro sports star one day. But...not yet, obviously. I have lots of work to do.



My teen years were kind of weird - a little bit lonely. Robin was around, but he was also working down at the police station most days. My immortal ancestors weren’t around very much. When I ran into my mother in the upstairs hallway one day, I realized that we hardly knew each other. (Mom just enthused about exercise a bunch of times, and that fixed that.)



For a while, four out of five immortals were staying in the Elder Flat together. I guess the powers that be wanted a break from managing so many crazy old ladies. It…didn’t go very well. Though my mom had a great time with the fire, as usual.



On another day, Mom was locked up in her workshop. Later she was found like this. I think my mom might be losing her mind a little bit.



Prom happened on my first weekend as a teenager. I got all dressed up and created a rather stunning updo for my hair, complete with sparkly violet bobby pins. Don’t let my pouty face fool you - I looked, and felt, pretty amazing.



Robin saw me getting ready to leave and pulled me aside for another one of his very serious chats.

“There will be boys your age at this shindig,” he informed me. “Just remember that none of them are good enough for you. Okay?”
“Obviously. I don’t typically associate with pudding faces.”
“Good. That is, you can make friends with them. Just don’t…fall for any of them.”



I couldn’t promise that. And I certainly couldn’t promise that none of them would fall for me. I mean, look at me!



I arrived at the school just as the sun was setting. I felt like a queen. A queen ready to win prom queen.

And win I did! I barely knew my classmates, but they decided I was the most popular and beautiful student anyway. I was not surprised. I even had my acceptance speech prepared of time.



I did more than win prom queen. I also…um…fell for a pudding face, a little bit. Her name was Lizette Gunderson. Here she is burping loudly on her way out of the building. She’s…not perfect, but we got along so well that by the end of the night we were romantic interests.



When I got home, I called over the nearest paparazzi to get one last shot of me in my getup. I was like, “I’ve got your front page shot right here!” That’s when we learned that drawing attention from paparazzi allows them to get inside your house. I reluctantly banished the dude, and Mom made me swear never to do that again - at least not on the home lot.



The next day, I asked Lizette on a date. We went to Lars’ Disco-tech, where we cuddled on a loveseat and watched all the elderly fairies attempting to dance in the colorful lights.



Lizette may not be a suitable dynasty spouse, but I really liked spending time with her anyway. I told her all about my family and how I was going to be the sixth immortal and live forever, along with five generations before me and two after me. Lizette was confused and fascinated, and a very good listener. I loved telling her all the dramatic stories I’d heard about the last few centuries.



Other than dating Lizette, I didn’t do anything terribly exciting as a teen. I started learning to cook, because I was not a fan of my various grandmothers’ cooking (except Starling’s, but she’s level 10). Only the highest-quality food for me! Of course, my cooking's not very good yet, either. But I'd rather eat my own poorly made food than somebody else's.



I went for the occasional jog and used my new upstairs gym, but I had to be cautious not to get too far in the athletic skill. I still needed to get plenty of opportunities as an adult. Mostly I just jogged to stay in shape.



I learned the recipe for chile con carne and discovered that spicy food is VERY dramatic. Therefore I love it. What a rush!



Robin and I hung out a lot. Robin picked up a soccer ball somewhere and taught me how to juggle. I was going to be a professional athlete one day, so it was good to get some practice at impressing the fans in the stands.



Like I said before, most of the previous immortals were kept out of sight during this time. Great-Grandma Chickadee was the only one around most of the time (she still works at the hospital, so she doesn’t get locked up like the others often do.) I like Chickadee - I think she’s the least crazy out of all the Branches. Besides me, of course. The others are always running around like maniacs, setting fires and arguing and flirting with the nearest unavailable man. Chickadee just sits and reads her medical journals.



When the immortals got stir crazy, they went out on one of their band tours. They took the motive mobile to various locations around town and got to jamming. They even picked the graveyard once, which was not a happy experience for Goldfinch. It was a very happy experience for the ghost that snuck up on her, though!



Robin was a very successful international super spy, and had become quite famous in Hidden Springs. He signed some autographs on his way out of work on his last day as an adult.



Then old age hit him like a truck.



Yikes. I watched the man I’m going to marry someday turn into an old man before my eyes. All I could think was, Gosh, I hope I look better than that when I’M an elder one day.



Robin fixed his hair and looked much better after that. You know, maybe growing old one day won't be that bad. I'm glad I don't have to think about it yet.



As for me…my young adult birthday was coming up fast. I couldn’t wait to hit my physical peak and start working on my requirements! My main task: become a superstar athlete. And remain beautiful for as long as I live, of course.


Notes from a watcher who is tired of micromanaging a million elders
-- Sparrow’s growing up years were pretty boring. I was starting to feel a bit bored of the dynasty overall at this point - suddenly, after Sandpiper became immortal, everything felt a lot less urgent. And since I was tired of wrangling all the elders and trying to keep them from causing mischief, I decided to lock them all up in various places on the lot and just focus on Sparrow and Robin for a while. This ended up being even more boring - I found that I missed the chaos!
-- I basically stopped paying any attention to Sandpiper after she became immortal. I think she sensed this, because suddenly I kept finding her singed and surrounded by scrap piles in random places on the lot. I think she’s been autonomously detonating things - but I haven’t caught her at it, and I haven’t figured out what, if anything, she is actually blowing up. I laughed out loud when I found her in her workshop, singed and in her underwear, playing with a toy cow in the midst of her piles of scrap. I just hope she doesn’t detonate anything important when I’m not looking.