When last we'd left the glorious and delightful Nessy, she was doing everything perfectly.Nessy: I like this narrator. He's very accurate.
Pippin: And not at all helpful. You're way off course and we need to get things straightened out.
Nessy: Fine, I'm coming over.
Pippin: Wait, what? But my show's on!
Nessy: Really? Your
show is more important than your only watched Sim? And you really do have a nicer house than me.
Pippin: At the moment. Now, can you wait until I finish this episode of The Urbs?
Nessy: Nope!
And with that, the delightful Nessy alights like a graceful eagle majestically staking her claim on a space on the couch.
Pippin: Alright, the narrator no longer gets to be part of this discussion.
Nessy: I'm willing to marry the Sim you've picked.
Pippin: No, you have to...wait, what?
Nessy: Yeah, I mean, I can't very well have a child with Octavia since she has a child and that would immediately end my dynasty.
Pippin: Right, so you're ending the relationship with...
Nessy: So I'm going to stay with her romantically, but very unromantically have a baby with whatever schmuck you've chosen!
Pippin: ...why are you like this?
Nessy: You mean awesome? Just blessed I suppose, right, Narrator?
Indeed, Nessy. Indeed! And with that, our beloved founder heads off to meet the aforementioned schmuck.
Nessy: Ah, down-on-his-luck, struggling comic? That seems about right. Just after him for the genetics, Pippin?
Pippin: Still trying to watch my show!
Nessy: Oh great. The schmuck is just another loser watching The Urbs.
Johnny: Seriously, you were on a break! Jut give it up, Michelle!
Nessy: Hello? Loser?
Johnny: AHH!! Oh. You startled me. Sorry. And you are...?
Nessy: Nessy. Pippin sent me to...
Johnny: Ah, another Pippin dynasty? I'm assuming you're recruiting me as a pollinator?
Nessy: No, I...actually, kind of yes. I need a spouse and a baby, but after that, you're off the hook.
Johnny: Soooooo, let me see if I've got this straight. I'm going to marry you and we're going to have a baby, but then we're just effectively business partners starting a dynasty with no continued expectations of romantic connection?
Nessy: Exactly! I mean, I've kind of got a thing going with Octavia Moon, so...
Johnny: Seriously?!? She's gorgeous!
Nessy: I know, right?
Johnny: Well, I mean, if we're being honest, I've kind of got a thing for one of my co-workers.
Nessy: Done! I'm your wingman. First though, I believe I hear wedding bells.
Nessy: So, shall we?
Johnny: I'm so in!
Johnny: With this ring, I thee help with a dynasty.
Nessy: I accept! And nice ring, by the way! You just happened to have this laying around?
Johnny: Oh, funny story. Pippin mailed it to me and here I was all like, "Why would he send me a ring? That's so weird," but it all makes sense now.
Nessy: K, so...one other thing we need...
Pippin: This is so not romantic. This was supposed to be the romance update and everyone was supposed to gush over what a cute couple you are, but oh no, you just have to have your own desires and wishes and give no consideration to how I'd planned the dynasty to go...
Nessy: K, I'm gonna go take a pregnancy test.
Johnny: Sweet, just text me the results, I've gotta go to work.
Nessy: Ooooo, with your
love interest?
Johnny: (blushing) ..yeah.
Pippin: So not romantic.
And with news that the family is about to be a ittle bigger...Nessy: Ka-ching!
we need to add on to the house.
Pippin: So, yeah, this is what that weird hallway thing was for. Staircase to the upper floor.
Nessy: Johnny gets the downstairs bedroom, Octavia and I have the upper suite, and baby boo has a nursery all ready to go.
Pippin:
So not romantic.
Nessy: Gotta go share the baby news with my sweetheart!
Nessy: We're gonna have a baby!!
Octavia: Ohmygosh!!!
Octavia: I'm so happy!! I love you so much!
Nessy: Back attcha, hot stuff!
Pippin: Eh, I guess it's more romanticy.
And that's not a word.Pippin: Whatever, snark box. And Nessy, don't you have a job to get to?
Nessy: Yep! Gotta sell some soap!! Takes a real up and coming start to do that!
The up and comingest!Pippin: Okay, who's making up words now?
Costumer: Okay, you're all set!
Nessy: Yeah, nothing says soap like a pirate!
Nessy: Aaaaaaarh ye havin' troubles swabbin' yer deck? Then ye be needin'...
Nessy: Seven Seas Suds! Bring me anything else and ye'll be walkin' the plank!
Director: And cut! That was perfect, baby! You're great! Truly an up and coming star!
Nessy: Hmmm, this guy really knows what he's talking about!
And our triumphant young shining star returns to her less humble than it previously was home.
Nessy: Hey, welcome back, John boy! So, how was the day with your sweetheart?
Johnny: Eh, she kind of doesn't really notice me.
Nessy: Alright, spill, bro. How can Nessy help?
Johnny: I just...I never know what to say.
Nessy: Be you, dude! It's not a comedy routine, so stop trying to script it. Just chat. Start with "hi" and see where it goes from there.
Johnny: That's...kind of helpful, actually.
Nessy: Of course it is. I'm rather brilliant.
So brilliant that she doesn't even need the genius trait to be this clever.Nessy: Thanks, narrator. Anyway, the only thing you need to have ready is an exit strategy. Start with "hi," and know how to get out if things fall apart immediately. Built-in safety net, you know?
Johnny: …I'm gonna talk to her. This is happening.
Nessy: Yeah, baby! Then you can have her over and all four of us can help take care of the little one!
Pippin: This household is just weird.
And with that, we bid farewell to our lovely and talented founder and her little one who is blessed enough to be coming out of the world's greatest gene pool.Nessy: A bit much at the end, but I liked it anyway.
