Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty [COMPLETE]

[MarianT]

I cracked up when I saw Grim at the end. How perfect for Tallulah!

[sdhoey]

OMG that was just. Beyond words. Grim is too much. Lol

[oshizu]

I distinctly saw her share a little smirk with us while she was lying her head on Grim's lap! LOL
Loved the room colors and lighting, the poses, and Tallulah's nuanced facial expressions!

Seducing He Who Cannot Be Seduced--the perfect trial for Tallulah! *applauds heartily

(whispers: Did he not speak so we wouldn't wonder if he was Mr. Gamba?)

[PeregrineTook]

Oh heavens!!  I never identified a favorite, but it was totally Tallulah and I was really looking exciting to see what the labyrinth of insanity held for her.  Totally not disappointed!!!

[wfgodot]

Oh Tallulah!!!!

I had to laugh at the line of former lovers and the most recent standing there amongst the ghosts.  The lone survivor!  Something about him standing there is adorable, and of course, her offering to catch up with him later

The way she talks to people!  Geez, no wonder even Grim is bending to her wills.  It's so cool the way she just instantly puts on all her charms, and even acknowledges that he can't be seduced, whilst doing exactly that.
All the giggling and cuddling!  And then in the end she just walks out the door and brushes the dust off her hands.  A job well done.

I liked it when she said that's what she loves most about him.  Reminds me of when she was a child and said that to everyone!

And Grim left heartbroken and abandoned like the rest!  Oh geez Tallulah.  Well played.
(Glad to see Wendell's still hanging in his hot dog suit!)

[FrancescaFiori]

@MarianT I thought Grim was pretty appropriate. The last undiscovered territory.

@sdhoey Thank you! Grim is pretty funny and expressive for a guy with no face.

@oshizu Oh yeah, there was definitely some smirking going on there. Tallulah the Unfazed! I didn't want him to speak. I liked him being totally impassive and just softening up with his body language, but Mr. Gamboa was definitely on my mind a bit this chapter. I'd still like to go back and finish his story out someday.

@PeregrineTook Oh, good! I'm so glad Team Tallulah still has at least one member! And I'm very glad I didn't let you down!

@wfgodot Yup! Tallulah has had her technique down since childhood. I'm so glad you liked it. And I don't think Wendell is ever taking that suit off again.

VIII:  Elevator Pitch



Cressida: What is this now? I thought you got all repent-y and tried to redeem yourself at the end. Why are you blocking the path now?

Reiko:  I wasted my life, Cressida. I spent the whole thing working against your family. I want another chance. I want to do it right and live my life for myself this time. The Huntingtons have offered to resurrect me if I stop you, so that’s what I’m here to do.

Akito:  Are they going to correct your goofy walk, too? What else are you getting?

Reiko:  We didn’t discuss that.

Akito:  Classic mistake. Always negotiate.

Cressida:  Yeah, you’re totally leaving money on the table.

Reiko:  I’m getting my life back! I didn’t want to pick nits!

Akito:  See? I feel like that attitude is what made your first attempt at life such a failure. Don’t settle. You’re selling yourself short. You’re probably just going to end up unsatisfied again.

Reiko:  Well, I’m thinking of becoming a vampire this time, so I’ll have a lot of time to make mistakes and try again.

Cressida:  Sounds an awful lot like the definition of insanity to me. No matter how many lifetimes you get, if you keep making the same mistakes you can’t expect different results.

Reiko:  Can we just fight now? I want to get this over with!

Cressida:  As you wish.





Cressida:  Well, better luck next time!

Reiko:  Dang it!

Thaddeus: Hey guys! What did I miss?

Cressida:  Not much. I saved the dynasty, and Reiko’s evil again.

Thaddeus:  Again? Girl, you have got to start making different choices.

Akito:  I was literally just telling her that.

Reiko:  I hate you guys.

Cressida:  Do you? Or do you really hate yourself?



Reiko:   This is me slinking away. Just let me slink.

Thaddeus:  Well, thanks for helping me out, guys! I feel loved.

Akito:  Well, you didn’t think you were getting through a chapter without giving me a smooch, did you?



Cressida:  Ugh. Deja vu. You guys are still super gross.

Thaddeus:  And loving it!



Thaddeus:  See you guys soon, I hope!

Akito:  We’ll be waiting!



Thaddeus:  Well, isn’t this somber?

Jalila:  It’s meant to be. All right. Go ahead.



Thaddeus:  Go ahead and . . . ?

Jalila:  Give us your pitch. You’re a start-up guy. What’s your product? If we want to invest, you can go through the door. You have thirty seconds.



Thaddeus:  You want my elevator pitch? Seriously? I swear guys, off all the old white dude things you’ve put us through in this quest this is by far the old white dude-iest.



Jalila:  Twenty-five seconds.



Thaddeus:  All right. All right. I hope you at least have your AV setup ready for me because this is not happening without powerpoint.

Jalila:  It’s in order. Go on.



Thaddeus:  Hi. I’m Thaddeus Spiffendale. I’m an innovator. I’m an innovator and I’m also a Dynasty Man. These two parts of my identity are very important to me, and yet I’m responsible for only one of them. I wasn’t born an innovator, but I was born into a Dynasty. I had that part handed to me. I lived my life in a house optimized for maximum skilling filled with valuable mentors to guide my every step.



Thaddeus:  But what about those Sims who aren’t as fortunate? I’m talking, of course, about founders. They’re some of the most common types of sims, and yet they have the fewest advantages. Dynasty founders are thrust into the world fully-formed. They have no childhood skills to build on, no connections to help them succeed, and often no place to call home except an empty lot.



Thaddeus:  The first week, day, the first moments of a dynasty are critical, and the founder faces them alone. There’s so much to do, so much to accomplish. You need help.



Thaddeus:  You need help.



Thaddeus:  You need help. But who’s going to help you? And how do you choose those people? How do you choose the people with whom you’re going to spend a lifetime? In some cases, several lifetimes? How can you know in the brief time you have who’s going to be able to take on the job? How do you know if they’re even suited to the position? And what about spouses? How do you begin the conversation that will end only a few minutes later in a blissful, or possibly miserable, marriage?



Thaddeus:  There are methods of course. You can grind your way up to enough points to become observant. Aliens can go a slightly more invasive route. Or you could wing it and hope for the best. Cross your fingers and hope you don’t arrive back at your empty lot with an evil, child-hating, commitment-phobe.

But what if there were another way?



Thaddeus:  What if there were a social network designed just for founders and potential helpers? A place where sims can list their skills, traits, financial assets, and job levels, and their level of willingness to devote themselves to a gigantic undertaking such as a dynasty. Users can even post their availability and schedule meet-ups.



Thaddeus:  Looking to find a spouse? Users can list turn-ons and turn-offs. No more embarrassing rejected hugs! If he’s unflirty, you’ll know in advance.



Thaddeus:  How about pollinating? It’s nobody’s favorite part of a dynasty, but it’s essential. Check out this guy! He’s cute, right?



Thaddeus:  He’s also mean, unflirty, and jealous! He’d be a nightmare, and thanks to my innovation, you’d know in advance. He’d never make it past your door.



Thaddeus:  I call it, “The Drill.”  Drill down into the details of your potential dynasty helpers and build a team that’s truly unstoppable. Next time you run into a gardener in the park, don’t start with, “Hello.” Just look her in the eye and say, “You know The Drill.”



Jalila:  Shut up and take my money!

Jeffrey:  I have to say, that was a very convincing Powerpoint.

J: You know, I’ve been thinking about starting a dynasty myself, but didn’t know where to begin. This makes it so simple!



Thaddeus:  Your generous support is much appreciated.


Credit for the PowerPoint slides goes 100% to @wfgodot, who very graciously and patiently held my hand through the process of learning Photoshop Elements. Thank, bro! You're the best!

[Caterina]

That was very entertaining.  It has been so much fun being reunited with all of my favorite Spiffendales.  I loved how you wrote Cressida and Akito's interaction with Reiko.

I was wondering how you would challenge Thaddeus.  Brilliantly, of course!

What a great treat it was to find an update today.  I'm excited to read what comes next.

[MarianT]

I'm sold on the Drill. Where can I buy it? Oh wait, that was part of the maze. Darn. Great job, by the way, and the Power Point pictures were well done!

[wfgodot]

I LOVED Thaddeus's presentation!  Mostly cause it makes me think of my own Matt rattling off the perks to the pollinators.  "You in?"
I think it's a really smart idea for a product.  Especially for sims, and especially in a dynasty thread!  Plus social media is pretty much life these days.
I just really liked the way he presented everything and he makes very valid points!  It really is kind of scary to just ask a random person you cloudgazed with to move in, and then have to house them until they die!

I was happy to see Cressida again.  Everyone has done pretty amazing on their own but I kind of missed her stepping in to help out the last couple chapters!  And it was so nice to see Akito and Thaddeus together briefly.  It was like he died and then we just never saw the guy again.  I missed him!  I knew I missed him at first but then it faded and now seeing them kissing again I realize how much I missed him!

Reiko... trying to beat Cressida with that flower or what?  lol

Still not used to seeing Thaddeus old.

You did really well with the screenshots.  I like these sims.

[oshizu]

A powerpoint presentation, what a perfect trial for your resident Startup Entrepreneur!
You even caved and had him wear that career outfit you dislike so much (but I still love Thaddeus in that mock turtleneck)!
I'm converted, sign me up, Thaddeus! Where do I wire-transfer my subscription fee?

Is it just my imagination or is that potential pollinator somehow related to Akito? He wouldn't be the son of Thaddeus/Akito, would he?
Just a wild guess, since he's blonde. Maybe it's just the hair and the Unflirty trait.

Awwww, like wfgodot, I was happy to see Akito and Thaddeus lip-locked once more. Cressida's usual disgust at their PDA was hilarious!

And by the way, Cressida looks super gorgeous in that first shot!

[PeregrineTook]

Nice!  We had gross dads, a fight including condescending banter, and a PowerPoint!  It'd be pretty hard to squeeze much more awesome into an update!

[FrancescaFiori]

@Caterina Thank you so much! It's been really fun for me to focus on everybody one at a time, too, and revisit my favorite parts of their stories and personalities.

@MarianT Thanks! So glad you're on board to invest! The future is now! Thanks for the compliment on the Powerpoint. I was pretty ridiculously proud of myself.

@wfgodot I think I was inspired by Matt and his perfect pollinator pitch. He's really got it down! I was happy to work Cressida in again, too. She gets a little moment in this next one as well. Well, I guess "last one" rather than "next one." AGH! It's ending! What will I do with myself? *deep breaths*

The flower is a symptom of my ongoing battle with cc. I made Rieko a vampire so the fight would look more interesting (which it didn't but . . . oh, well), and I can't disable cc for vampires without making it so no vampires can use cc ever. The flower was supposed to be a prop for Tallulah's chapter (another failed idea) so now it just pops up in the hands and mouths of random vampires to taunt me. *sigh*

@oshizu I mean, the turtleneck was the only appropriate outfit for that presentation. Thaddeus will have his people call your people and get you all set up with The Drill.
That potential pollinator is actually Jack Hammer, a sim I made from scratch for last year's handiness tournament challenge. I thought he was too cute to just hang out languishing in my library, so I changed his traits and plopped him in this chapter. He does look a lot like Akito, though, and they have identical taste in hairstyles and fashion.
Cressida does make a really good-looking elder!

@PeregrineTook Thanks! Yup, checked all the boxes for a good chapter, I'd say. Glad you're the one making the checklist.

IX:  The Hall of Fame



Thaddeus:  So . . . that’s it then. What happens now?

Pernille:  You don’t think it was all a trick and we’re stuck in this hallway eternally, do you?

Cressida:  I mean . . . I wouldn’t put it past our ghost ancestors to be jerkwads like that, but something tells me our anti-climax isn’t going to be quite that anticlimactic.



Arianna:  Oh, hey! Check it out! Disappearing walls! Oh, and it’s morning! Good morning, everyone!

Tallulah:  Whoa! Look at that!



Thaddeus:  Holy smokes, Watcher! What is that? Are we going to get to go in there?

Watcher:  Oh! Um . . . well, no. That’s the Hall of Fame.



Watcher:  You don’t get to go in there. Just . . . there’s a path down the side for you to follow. Just kind of go around, okay?

Thaddeus:  But I want to go in there!

Watcher:  Look, you can’t. It’s not for you, all right? But it’s not a big deal. It’s not that great. It’s not like there’s a pizza party going on in there or anything.



Thaddeus:  There’s a PIZZA PARTY?

Watcher:  No, no. I just told you there’s NO pizza party. Why would that make you think there’s a pizza party? There’s definitely no pizza party!



Dude:  Oh, man! Can you believe this party? This is incredible! This has to be the best pizza I’ve ever tasted!



Colt:  I know! It’s amazing! I think it was worth doing the entire dynasty just to be able to come here. This is the best party ever!



Thaddeus:  Are you sure? Because I think I hear music coming from in there, and now that I think about it, I can kind of smell pizza.

Watcher:  You’re imagining things! I said “pizza” so now you think you smell pizza. It’s psychological. Believe me, there’s no party. Would I lie to you?

Thaddeus:  Probably. You’re pretty morally relativistic when it comes to things like this.

Watcher:  Things like pizza?

Thaddeus:  Things like getting me to do what you want me to do

Watcher:  I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.



Party:  *rages*



Wendell:  Hey, Thad! What’s going on in there?

Thaddeus:  Not a pizza party, apparently.

Wendell:  Really? Because I could have sworn I just heard the sound of a crowd getting hyped.

Thaddeus:  Watcher? You got any response to that?

Watcher:  Like I said, there’s a path down the left side of the building. If you could all just scoot around, please and follow it . . .







Skye:  Are you sure that’s a good idea? Don’t you remember what happened last time somebody in your family “took out the tea?” I think this party is probably crazy enough as it is.

Takao:  Oh, it'll be fine! I can always put it back!

Skye:  Okay, if you say so.





Tallulah:  I don’t know. Sounds an awful lot like a party to me.

Otto:  I know! I’m pretty sure that’s Machine music playing.

Watcher:  Sheesh, you guys! Just keep walking, all right? Enough chatter!

Voice:  *ahem* Cressida? Could I get your attention for a moment, dear?



Cressida:  What? I’m busy.

J:  If you could direct your attention to the wall there, I think there’s something that might interest you .  . .

Cressida:  Nope. Not interested.

J:  It’s the family you could have had! If you’d been a normal sim and had the opportunity to live the life you wanted-

Cressida:  Yeah, I’m going to go ahead and stop you right there. “Normal,” is not something that appeals to me in the slightest, and I did live the life I wanted. I got go beat a lot of people up, eat unlimited grilled cheese, build a criminal empire, and I had a cute husband who I never saw enough for me to get sick of him. It was ideal. Every minute. I’m sorry you’ve mistaken me for someone with a hidden Suzie Homemaker fetish, but  . . .actually, scratch that. I’m not sorry. You’re an idiot. It’s over. Now move.

J:  But! I can offer you-

Cressida:  Nothing that I want. Bye.



Cressida:  Okay, I’m back. What did I miss?

Mallory:  Nothing. We’re still waiting on Morris. We all jogged and he decided to stroll. You want to catch up, maybe, Dad?

Morris:  Morris Spiffendale moves at a sedate and dignified pace, regardless of the situation. I’ll get there when I get there!

Thaddeus:  *sigh*



Cressida: Huh. Looks like kind of a Mad Hatter’s Tea Party sort of situation.

Jalila:  Won’t you please join us? There are seats for everyone.



Jalila:  Let me be the first to offer my congratulations. You’ve won.



Arianna:  Yes. Um, neat. So . . . what is it that we’ve won exactly? I don’t mean to be obtuse, but I’ve been studying the situation for more than a few lifetimes now, and I’m still not really clear on why we were doing all of this.



Jalila:  The house, dear. You’ve won Huntington Estates. We’ve poured our lives, afterlives, and souls into guarding the fortune and secrets of the Huntington name, and now you’ve discovered them. Our secrets are now yours, and the role of guardian falls to you. You all are the new Protectors of the Estate.



Morris:  I’m sorry. So you’re saying we get to make up our own insane funhouse obstacle course for whomever comes next?

Jalila:  Precisely. We have failed to protect the estate ourselves, but we’ve succeeded in finding a group of individuals who can do the job. You’ll have plenty of time to plan. Any other treasure-seekers will need at least eight generations to put together a team, and you’ll find aging is turned off permanently here, so you won’t have to worry about manufacturing ambrosia or any other life-extension methods.



Otto:  Wait a sec. If aging is off here, then why are you all ghosts? Shouldn’t you still be alive?

Jared:  Well, to be honest, we got a bit bored. I don’t know if you noticed, but we’re actually each a different type of ghost. We just wanted to see what dying was like so . . .

Otto:  Dude. Creepy.

Jared:  Eh. *shrugs* You sit around the same house long enough you start to crave a little excitement. Nothing’s more exciting than electrocution!

Otto:  Okay, still creepy, but next question:  Don’t you have to be related by blood to the Huntington family to even make an attempt at getting in? Cressida didn’t have any kids, so who’s even going to try?

Julia:  Just because Cressida didn’t leave any descendants doesn’t mean none of the rest of you did.

Pernille:  Dad . . . ?

Wendell:  What? What are you looking at me for? Typical! Everybody blames the guy in the hot dog suit!

Julia:  At any rate, you should find the Estates a comfortable enough dwelling place, and you shouldn’t lack for companionship as the eight-sim household size restriction has been lifted and you’re welcome to invite any of your spouses or friends to join you here. Speaking of which, Morris? There’s a pair of people who’d like to speak with you over by the chocolate fountain.

Morris:  *gulp*



Morris:  So . . . this is a bit awkward.

Betty:  A bit.

Morris:  I mean . . .

Diego:  Look, I’m nothing if not open-minded, Morris dear. I’m sure we can work something out.

Morris:  You think? Betty?

Betty:  Well, having had several generations to mull it over . . . yeah, I’m good. Diego seems nice.

Diego:  Oh, I am! I’m the nicest. Truly.

Morris:  Well, okay then.  Um . . .tea?

Betty and Diego:  Two sugars, please.

Morris:  Coming right up!



Arianna:  Well, J, honey. Can you believe it?

J:  Not quite.

Arianna:  Here we are. Together again, at last.

J:  And staying that way, I hope.

Arianna:  You’d better believe I’m not letting you go ever again.

J:  Hmm.

Arianna:  Did you just tense up?

J: What? No! Of course not!

Arianna:  Seriously? You’ve been faithful to me your whole life and your whole extended death and you’re going to get non-committal on me now?

J:  No! I’m fine! I just . . . I could maybe do with a bath and a massage, but really, I’m good. I’m happy. This is where I want to be.

Arianna:  Well, good. Because I think we’re both here to stay.

J:  You and me.

Arianna:  And pretty much everyone we’ve ever met.

J:  Well, let’s just stay you and me by this fire for a bit, okay?

Arianna:  You got it, sweetie. Anything for you. We’ll let somebody else have the adventures for awhile.

THE END

Just wanted to say a quick note of thanks to everyone who’s read this story, particularly those of you who encouraged me to keep on writing it when I failed the challenge. I can’t even begin to tell you how satisfying it’s going to be to finally mark this as Complete! I have loved every minute of writing The Spiffendales and sharing them with you. This community is the absolute greatest place on the internet, and I feel so fortunate to be a part of it. Thank you so much! Hugs for everyone!

A particularly gigantic special thanks to @sdhoey @MarianT @ilovethesims @Alex @oshizu @tjtemple and @Playalot for sharing their Hall of Famer sims with me to attend the pizza party! I had THE BEST time hanging out with them, and I’m so grateful to you for going along with my pizza joke! Someday I hope I’ll be able to send my own sims to that party, but I’m sure the pizza will taste all the sweeter for having earned it after a setback. Congratulations again to all of you for your amazing accomplishments! Keep the dance floor warm for me!  I’ll go ahead and put the Hall of Fame up on the gallery in case anybody else wants to join in the fun and celebrate. Cheers!

[oshizu]

An appropriately wonderful finale to one of my all-time favorite Sims stories!!!

Cressida's last convo about the life-she-could-have-had brought to mind Nikos Kazantzaki's The Last Temptation.
Cressida didn't even stop to consider the offer (but I zoomed in to check out the toddlers, lol!)

We should be thanking you for forging on after your setback! Your determination brought us the unforgettable Spiffelogues!
Thanks for allowing my sims to be a part of this story's conclusion.

Looking forward most eagerly to whatever your next project might be! Don't keep us waiting!

[MarianT]

What am I going to do without the Spiffendales? I especially enjoyed seeing Morris re-unite with Betty and Diego. I'm glad to know that they'll be hanging out at the Huntingdon Estate, devising ever more fiendish ordeals for the next group.

Really great job, and I am going to miss their story!

[sdhoey]

*Standing Ovation* Congratulations, you did a great job. I'm sorry to see the Spiffendales go, but they have earned a vacation. Now they can relax at their estate and enjoy life. Great job on the pizza party, Colt and Skye looked great. So did Dude.