Chapter 19
Later that day I took Vic out to her favorite Jazz club. She had mentioned that her all time fav jazz piano player was doing a gig there and I wanted to surprise her.
She looked beautiful and I told her so. It was good to have the opportunity to show Vic the more congenial side to my personality and it was really good to see her relaxed and enjoying the atmosphere. I felt like I had to prove to Vic that I was worthy. Silly I suppose in some ways as she has known me forever and we had been briefly boyfriend/girlfriend during our teen years. Still, I wanted to make up for all my grumpiness and make Vic happy.
Don came by and congratulated us. I didn't know him very well but he had helped me train a few times down at the local gym.
As I watched Vic's eyes follow Don to his seat that old fire-pit in my guts roared into life. I swallowed hard, tapping down the irrational emotions that threatened to over take me.
The music was calling to us all. Everyone danced and laughed. It was easy to lose myself in the moment.
Later, as we sat at the bar chatting, Vin dropped in. It was good to see him. We acknowledged each other with our customary chin-lift and I knew that everything between us was just fine.
And then it started again. As I listened to Vic chat merrily away to the Grim Reaper my envy reached unknown heights. I kept thinking, 'So she wants to flirt with death eh'. The phrase echoed around and around in my head. This was ridiculous. I had to get a grip on my emotions. I knew Vic was just chatting. I knew my reaction was wrong.
I told Vic is was late and time we went home. She just looked at me like she knew exactly what I was thinking even though I had managed to keep a lid on my thoughts. At least this time, I hadn't exploded.
The next morning I pounded my frustration at my lack of control out on the punching bag. I will win over this, I will. I kept telling myself.
I worked out for hours until finally I felt calm and in control. It felt good
I had built a pool in the basement but only I had the key to it. It wasn't that I wanted to exclude anyone from using it... I just didn't want to risk anymore accidents. I finished my work out with a few laps. Then went upstairs to check on Vic.
Perry and her have become good friends. I guess they have managed to find some common ground to chat about. As I half listened to their chatting I felt a pang of resentment that they could be happy when I was struggling so hard to gain control over my maelstrom of emotions. I was having a pity party for one and the self awareness of that fact wasn't helping any.
Vic kept a close eye on Kacey's little seed.
She watered it daily and chatted to it. It was growing into something quite special, kinda cute actually. I was impatient to see what it would finally become.
Perry and I had managed to remain friends and at times, we could have really good conversations and fun together.
Other times she says the strangest of things and it brings it all back home to me that she really is a shadow of her former self.
Poor Vic had been complaining of a sore back most of that day. I had offered to take her to the spa hoping that a massage would relieve some of her pain but she didn't want to go telling me that she would rather just stay at home.
I tried to do most of the chores, cooking and so on so that Vic could put her feet up. It was then that I noticed that Kacey's plant had become something extraordinary.
By the time I had tuned the oven off Vic was already touching the plant. I yelled at her to get away! I remember thinking it could be highly dangerous.
I realized though, as soon as I saw it up close that it was completely harmless. Docile even. It was the strangest, most fantastical thing I had ever seen. How like Kacey to have found something so remarkable. The memory made me happy. I had almost given up hope of Kasey coming back from the dead to be with me again but having this creature-plant somehow strengthened my resolve to keep the dream alive.
I headed out for a run, determined later to go to the library to do some research on Kacey's plant.
Unfortunately, events at home made me forget all about doing that. Vic wasn't enjoying labor, needless to say.
I called through the door if she wanted anything. She just groaned and told me to go away.
Moments later I heard a nooboo cry and Vic calling out my name. Drakkar Moody had been born. My step-son and boy was I proud!
