THE PINKERTON 4X4 DYNASTYIN THE BEGINNING...
Watcher: Psst! Gavin Pinkerton! You’re my new dynasty founder.
Gavin: Me? Why me?
Watcher: Several reasons, actually. You’re good-looking in a non-clone kind of way. You have a large house, with three bedrooms and a pool. You’re descended from a famous detective.
Gavin: Who?
Watcher: Allan Pinkerton, who founded the Pinkerton Detective Agency in 1850. It provided spies against the Confederacy during the Civil War, but became infamous for anti-union battles in the late 19th and early 20th centuries. It still survives today as the company, Securitas. Anyway, all of your descendants will be named after famous fictitious detectives. And these are the last two reasons – a Bwan Speedster and a Margaret Vaguester.
Gavin: My cars?
Watcher: Not anymore. Now they’re a building purchase.
Gavin: I have to take a taxi?
Watcher: Unless you’d rather ride a bicycle down to the elixir shop.
Gavin: But you don’t know who has been in this car. They might have had some terrible disease.
Watcher: Gavin, why did you become a doctor if you had a thing about terrible diseases?
Gavin: Because they let me use the autoclave to sterilize my silver whenever anyone else has used it.
Watcher: There’s no such thing as a hypochondriac trait and you’re not neurotic, so why…okay, go ahead and wash your hands if it makes you feel better. You can even take a shower.
Gavin: No showers! Do you know where that water comes from?
Watcher: Uh, the Appaloosa Plains Water Treatment Plant?
Gavin: People go there to fish. What does that tell you about the water?
Watcher: Well, I’m sure they remove all the fish stuff before it gets to your shower. Anyway, here’s your boss, Angel Jenner. Why don’t you talk to her?
Gavin: She looks a lot different when she’s not in her scrubs.
Watcher: Talk!
Gavin: Um, how are you, Dr. Jenner?
Angel: Ohhh, I suddenly feel nauseous. You’re a doctor. Do something!
Gavin: I can’t seem to find the problem…
Angel: Considering that it’s my stomach that’s upset, you might try looking lower down. OUCH!
Gavin: Still feeling nauseous?
Angel: No, the throbbing in my knee has quite calmed my stomach.
Watcher: You’d better start getting romantic; you need to get married and try for baby before Thursday.
Gavin: Um, you look really pretty today, Angel.
Angel: You’re pretty cute yourself.
Gavin: In fact, you’re so pretty, I just have to kiss you.
Angel: Whoa! Just because I’m dressed casually, and have the flirty trait, and have moved here from Bridgeport doesn’t mean you can just grab me! What kind of girl do you think I am?
Gavin: Um…
Watcher: Don’t answer that question. Just apologize.
Gavin: I’m sorry. I lost my head.
Angel: Well, you might lose your job if you’re not careful. I’m leaving.
Gavin: Great. My boss is mad at me. Now what?
Watcher: As long as we’re here, we’ll check and see if they have any Fountain of Youth potion, because face it, Gavin, you’re not the youngest dynasty founder there’s ever been, and it’s going to take some time for you to get those happiness points. Also, you can get that tiberium you picked up at the consignment store cut here.
As for Angel, I think you should do her paperwork tomorrow and become friends with her. Then invite her over – maybe take some of that invigorating potion beforehand so you don’t start yawning while you’re talking to her. Show her around the house – the living room…
The kitchen…
Then take her outside to look at the stars.
Confess to her that you’re really attracted and then give her a little peck on the cheek.
And then go down on one knee and propose.
Gavin: Don’t you think she’ll want to go to a movie or something first?
Watcher: No, she’ll be fine. Just remember – try for baby, work on happiness points, and get your hands on a young again potion. Oh, and change your lifetime wish as soon as you can. I don’t think anyone who’s clumsy should try to become a world-renowned surgeon. Bye!
