Plots and Plans“Yes, Lionel, I know you want to play on the slide but school’s more important. You need to do well.”
“Why can’t I just mess about with my friends? Lessons are
boooooooooooooooring.”
Ken sighed. He didn’t understand this son of his. “Look, let’s do a couple of hours and then you can go out and play.”
* * * * *
“Arrr! Shiver me timbers, Jim Laaaaaaad! Pieces of eight, nine
and ten! Cap’n Lionbeard rules the seven seas and all the oceans and… and... uh… whatever the other watery bits are called.”
He looked around shiftily but none of the crew had noticed. They wouldn’t dare.
"
Wheeeee!"
* * * * *
“Lionel, your dad asked me to talk to you – about why it’s important for you to do well at school.”
“But school’s
pathetic." (It was his new favourite word.) "I hate history and maths and Simlish…
“…and I hate my name. Why did they have to call me Lionel? It’s a girly name. It’s like Isabel and Annabel.”
“Or Daniel?”
“Oh... yes...! But there’s a Daniel in my class and everyone calls him Dan. Well, ‘cept his mum. She calls him Danny. That’s
so babyish. Even the teachers call him Dan… Hey, if he’s Dan, can I be Lion?”
“If you really want to. Why don’t you see what your friends think? Now, your dad asked me to tell you about our family…”
“But Dad wants me to be a p’liceman, doesn’t he? You just said we all had to have diff’rent jobs.”
“There are two sorts of police. You could be a spy.”
“A spy? That’d be cool.
Waaaaaay better than what Dad does.”
“You’d have to start out as an ordinary policeman, of course, and work your way up. Your dad could tell you more about it, if you’re interested. Walking the beat, catching criminals…”
“Hey, could I be a criminal? Or… what about a fireman?”
“Fireman’s already gone but you could be a criminal if you want.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really – although I don’t know what your father would say. But you don’t have to decide for a long time yet. All you have to do for now is do well at school. So will you let your dad tutor you?”
“I
suppose so, yes.”
“Look, why don’t you go out and play for a bit? It’ll be dark soon. And I’ll have a word with your dad.”
“Mwahaha! Take that, horsey! Dr Lion and his Evil Doom Ray will turn the whole world into little wooden animals!”
* * * * *
And, a day or two later, Lionel (not Lion after all – his best friend said it sounded stupid) had achieved an ‘A’ and was ready for another cake.
Later that evening, there was a less happy birthday.
“Ken, you know we always said we’d like another kid?”
“Yes?”
“Well now that Lionel’s growing up, I thought… I mean, there’s not much time left and…”
* * * * *
Their firstborn, unaware of his parents’ plans, was doing some serious thinking about his own future.
He wasn’t sure the criminal career was right for him. From what Gran India had told him, you had to be sporty. Mr Brown the PE teacher said he had two left feet. Anyway, just going around openly being a criminal was pretty lame. He’d prefer something more devious.
He wasn’t joining the police, either, whatever his father wanted. Perhaps he should go along with the other side of his personality – the one he normally tried to hide. It was pretty clear what his best subject was at school. Was there some way to use that? Something anti-establishment. Or maybe even something mock-respectable but with the possibility of a little illegal activity. You know, just for fun? He’d have to look around. Maybe even (horrors!) poke around in the careers library.
Meanwhile, back to the studying with Dad. Algebra tonight. Oh joy.
* * * * *
They couldn’t expect him to work all the time. He had to let off steam somehow. Cause and effect. Action and reaction. See? He was learning all that stuff, however pointless it was.
No plumbing fixture escaped his attention.
Nor did any chair. Well, Dad shouldn’t have gone on so much about the importance of thoroughness, should he?
Everyone was relieved when he came home with an ‘A’, Beth most of all.
Maybe now she’d be able to rush to the loo to be sick without risking it blowing up in her face. She might even be able to relax on the sofa or in a bubble bath as her bump expanded.
They all gathered around the cake, cheering from relief as much as from the usual birthday happiness, waiting for Lionel to make a wish and blow out the candles. And waiting…
He knew now what he wanted – but exactly how should he phrase it? He needed to get in every detail; get the best possible value out of the wish.
And he still hated his name. Josh had been right. Wanting to be called Lion
was ridiculous. What he needed was a more adult alternative, like… Like what? Then it came to him.
It was kind of a long sentence but he reckoned it’d still count as a single wish. Maybe. He leaned over and blew.
* * * * *
The next morning, he sorted out a suitably distinctive new look…
…carefully wheeled his birthday present out of the garage and roared off into town to put his plans into action.
First stop, City Hall, to register for his new job, change his name by deed poll and leave them a small memento of his visit.
Leo Gold was in business.
Next chapter (interlude)Next chapter of main story
Lionel and Leo are completely independent family names; the inspiration for combining them is literary (the protagonist of
The Go-Between). The original Sim Lionel was my first heartbreaker.
He wasn’t really very good at it: I didn’t give him the best traits. He used his charisma to go into politics and had become Leader of the Free World long before he achieved his LTW. It didn’t help that I felt so sorry for his victims: poor Molly French stood crying outside his house all night after he dumped her. Eventually, he married Agnes Crumplebottom (for her money? However could you suggest such a thing?) All of his exes came to the wedding and, surprisingly, claimed to have had a great time. The Legendary Host reward is wonderful
.