Author Topic: The Elven Town Jump-The End Has Come  (Read 313816 times)

Offline PeregrineTook

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The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #255 on: June 14, 2013, 07:02:23 PM »

"Charmaine is pregnant," said the Watcher.  "She and your brother are quite elated.  They're expecting twins!"



It was a that moment that the prince's phone rang.  "Sorry, gotta take this," he said, cutting off the Watcher's update.
The prince was irritated to get the call, but not surprised.
He climbed into his Sylvan motorcarriage and began the drive to the local school.



It seems Sotal had been "verbally inappropriate" with his teacher, and said teacher wanted a conference with Sotal's parents about it.  Dahlia, of course, wouldn't be able to make it as those dishes don't wash themselves.



As he walked through the hallway, he wondered what Sotal had done to get in such trouble.



"Mr. Breagadoir, thank you for coming in," greeted the teacher, cordially.  "I'm Mrs. Lambshanks."
"Charmed, I'm sure," greeted the prince with a smile.



"Young Sotal here had the nerve to refer to me as 'Hamshanks' and when I tried to correct him on it, he told me to, and I quote, 'stuff it, Butterball.'"
"Well, we have quite the issue here," said Breagadoir.
He then turned to his heir.



"That insult was childish at best," began the prince, "you should be ashamed you didn't come up with something better." 



"How about this:" he said turning to Mrs. Lambshanks, "did you know today is a special day in your honor?"
"Teacher appreciation day?" guessed the surprised educator.
"Nope," responded the prince, "trash day."
"Wow," said Sotal, "I've really learned a lot today, father.  May I be excused now?"
"Of course, said the prince, "your teacher and I have some more discussing to do."



"Now I must say, that was quite a display, Mr. Breagadoir," said the irate teacher.
"Well, we should absolutely discuss that," said Breagadoir, "but first..."




"Shall we chat?" asked the charming prince.



"Words are so overrated," responded the teacher.



Incidentally, Sotal made honor roll the next day...


Offline Swirl-Girl

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #256 on: June 14, 2013, 07:12:08 PM »
Well! That escalated quickly.

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Offline Wiry

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #257 on: June 14, 2013, 07:21:51 PM »
HahahaHA!
That made me laugh more than it should have  ;D
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Offline ILoveDolls

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #258 on: June 14, 2013, 08:29:19 PM »
I'm probably going to get in trouble for this, but...

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!  Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

That elf is incorrigible. OMG! Bet that's his wedding gift to Emelie! And still driving that Sylvan motorcarriage, eh? I'm sure he takes the circuitous route around a certain Victorian manor house every time he jumps in for a drive ;D

Offline PeregrineTook

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #259 on: June 14, 2013, 11:05:34 PM »
Well! That escalated quickly.
Things have to escalate quickly.  Breagadoir's a busy man...er...elf.

HahahaHA!
That made me laugh more than it should have  ;D
Yeah, it was just a wicked bit of humor more than plotline, but what better way to announce that the heir has made the honor roll?

I'm probably going to get in trouble for this, but...
Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!  Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
That elf is incorrigible. OMG! Bet that's his wedding gift to Emelie! And still driving that Sylvan motorcarriage, eh? I'm sure he takes the circuitous route around a certain Victorian manor house every time he jumps in for a drive ;D

Yeah, the motorcarriage fit him more than the broomstick ever did.  And yes, he passes by the Crumplebottom household and just smiles and waves.

Offline Dextra2

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #260 on: June 14, 2013, 11:18:07 PM »
Talk about bad to the bone. One day his wife will find out, and he'll need to have the loopeholes in his favor. But that's already done, I bet. ;D
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Offline Swirl-Girl

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #261 on: June 14, 2013, 11:25:29 PM »
That's just how on top of things he is.
Oh, wow, that came out differently than I thought it would.

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Offline kaseofhearts

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #262 on: June 14, 2013, 11:57:46 PM »
I was confused at first. I was like, he can't make her fat because she's already fat! Frog? Baby? Oh, lover. Fine. He certainly knows how to cut to the chase.

Offline PeregrineTook

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #263 on: June 15, 2013, 12:07:40 AM »
Talk about bad to the bone. One day his wife will find out, and he'll need to have the loopeholes in his favor. But that's already done, I bet. ;D
Well, Emelie already knows he sleeps with Dahlia, so how mad would she really get about him doing extracurricular activities at school?

That's just how on top of things he is.
Oh, wow, that came out differently than I thought it would.
Pretending I don't know what you meant...

I was confused at first. I was like, he can't make her fat because she's already fat! Frog? Baby? Oh, lover. Fine. He certainly knows how to cut to the chase.
Yeah, he used the "lean and mean" potion on her.  It didn't particularly make her pretty, though.

Offline RainBeau

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #264 on: June 15, 2013, 12:13:51 AM »
It certainly didn't. But business is business and pleasure is pleasure. Good job on the school. It looks just like out of a movie.
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Offline PeregrineTook

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Phone Call
« Reply #265 on: June 15, 2013, 12:29:56 AM »
It certainly didn't. But business is business and pleasure is pleasure. Good job on the school. It looks just like out of a movie.
Thank you so much!!  I worked really hard on the school room and was quite proud of myself for that one.  I don't pretend to be that great of a builder, but I thought this turned out surprisingly well.

Offline PeregrineTook

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The Elven Town Jump-The Stranger in a Strange Land
« Reply #266 on: June 15, 2013, 12:17:10 PM »

Sometimes, you're a visitor in an unfamiliar place.  Such was the case for young Damon.  He had been invited to come to the home of his half-sister Ella MacDuff after school.  Ella then promptly left.



Ella's mother and her mother's husband decided to simply sit on the porch and enjoy the brisk winter day.  Having the whole place to himself, young Damon did what any self-respecting opportunist would do.



He went on a treasure hunt.  However, the treasure that caught his eye, and distracted him from seeking any more treasures,



was a purple zebra pony.  Obviously, only the rarest of treasures will please this young lad.

In another part of town, someone else found themselves in an unfamiliar place. 
A young tourist from France stumbled upon a handsome gentleman in the park.



"Bonjour," she greeted him, "I am afraid I 'ave lost my way.  Could you 'elp me?"
"Ah, I can tell from your lovely accent that you are from France, my dear," the elven prince greeted her.  "I am a bit familiar with French culture myself."
"Truly?" she asked, a bit surprised.
"Indeed," he answered, waving some strange little stick around.



"Frog legs, for example," he continued, "are considered quite the delicacy in France."
She didn't respond to that statement, so he continued, "And instead of saying 'yes,'"



"you say, 'oui oui,' which tends to make small children here giggle."
She simply stood in her own stench and soiled state staring at her arms.
"Well, if you'll excuse me," he said politely, "I must be off to work.  Au revoir!"

On his way to his job, his Watcher updated him on his sister's progress.



"As you'll recall," she started, "your sister had been courting the son of her Nancy."



"Well, it seems her heir might be on the way.  At least this way it will have some of Nancy's DNA in it.  Oh, she broke up with Malcolm immediately after she learned she was pregnant," and she sighed.



Dahlia, meantime, was extinguishing a fire which Breagadoir had, apparently started in the front yard.

Breagadoir had been amused when he got the call.
"If I had anyone else I could ask," she had said, "I would have."
He was amused that his particular skill set had put him in this position.



Belinda Crumplebottom needed his help.  He enjoyed knowing just how much it was turning her goody-goody stomach to ask for his assistance.



"You were the only one who had both the needed skills and the knowledge of the guilty party," she began.
"Okay," he said, "I'll bite.  Who's the guilty party?"
She paused for a moment, then said, "Annalove Ivy."



Seems Miss Annalove had made the little bit of money she'd scraped together to get the house by associating with some less-than-reputable citizens.  How ironic that Breagadoir was finding the evidence against her.



And it seemed she'd had a male visitor that night.  Interesting, thought the elven prince.



However, his thoughts were interrupted as Annalove finally came out (he'd been banging around loudly enough for the neighbors to hear, after all).  Given this wonderful opportunity, he practiced the bladder control spell again.  It worked.



Once again, as a young elven heir simply works on his homework, he is watched by a shadowy stranger.



When the investifgator brought news of his discovery to Belinda, she was delighted.
"Exactly as I thought," she said happily.  "Now we'll just have to pull together and council the poor girl through this.  Maybe we could have a bake sale to raise money for her and the kids."
This was disappointing to the prince, so he decided to end their interaction on his own terms.



Worn out from a hard day's work, Breagadoir went home and climbed into bed...with the maid.





Offline ILoveDolls

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Stranger in a Strange Land
« Reply #267 on: June 15, 2013, 02:03:54 PM »
You simply cannot get angry with the elf. You can't. He does things in such a blasé, oh hey, by the way manner, that it's ridiculously funny. All of it!!

I'm disappointed that Damon didn't steal the pony. He must develop a klepto trait...all mooks have that!! Oui oui!!

Malcolm Landgraab, eh? The Malcolm Landgraab that fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down? Sheesh. Breagadoir would have a field day with that.

I wonder what he gave his client Belinda as a thank you for her business? Chuckle, chuckle.


Offline Wiry

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Stranger in a Strange Land
« Reply #268 on: June 15, 2013, 02:10:20 PM »
You simply cannot get angry with the elf. You can't. He does things in such a blasé, oh hey, by the way manner, that it's ridiculously funny. All of it!!

I'm disappointed that Damon didn't steal the pony. He must develop a klepto trait...all mooks have that!! Oui oui!!

Malcolm Landgraab, eh? The Malcolm Landgraab that fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down? Sheesh. Breagadoir would have a field day with that.

I wonder what he gave his client Belinda as a thank you for her business? Chuckle, chuckle.

One of us must be reading the other's mind here, I was typing up a very similar paragraph  ;D

I agree with everything Dolls said here, of course.

Damon and the Pink Zebra were possibly the most amusing things I've seen... until I saw Breagadoir again  :P
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Offline Dextra2

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Re: The Elven Town Jump-The Stranger in a Strange Land
« Reply #269 on: June 15, 2013, 03:55:41 PM »
Now I want a purple zebra pony.

And I agree Dolls, there's no getting angry at Breagadoir. He's just to much fun.
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