Chapter 31: The Cora ShowThank you again for all submissions to the For the Love of Simon Contest! The first eligible bachelorette will be introduced at some point in this update (probably.) I am on the fence about if I'm going to force babies or not, but we shall see how ridiculous I get as I continue to play this game. I can't make any promises and I think it would be fun if I left Simon to his own devices to see who he'd "choose" so we can get a few more of the girls in there, but let's face it. I am out of control and clearly obsessed with Simon and his ability to reproduce genetically superior spawn. And also, Kamela turned out GORGEOUS. So. We'll take this journey together.
Winnie, who may or may not have been absent in the past couple chapters, has decided to do stuff recently.
Like reading! (oooh. Aaah.)
And brooding! (Fascinating!)
And looking at stars! (This is actually slightly interesting!)
She found a celestial object and named it after her late love, who we all miss very much. (Everyone: Who?)
Everyone: Oh, yeah. The robot who got killed by a meteor. Is that not super insensitive to name a SPACE ROCK after a robot who was killed by a SPACE ROCK?
Winnie: ....
Oh, and Winnie also started working on her science skill! Which IS interesting. I don't even have to be sarcastic.
Since she's mastered almost every other skill possible, she'll have some fun doing science, maybe.
Winnie: Maybe I can make sense of these mutant gigantic seeds found around here.
And while Winnie was doing stuff that is hard to make jokes about, Cora was rolling a wish to get a new hair style.
Cora: This new hair has given me the confidence to throw off the shackles of my abusive family's hatred and spring forth a new life of love!
Cora: Yay for not hatred!
And while love was blooming for Cora, it has curled up and died a horrible, yet predictable death by the hands of Simon, the dream killer. He broke up with gorgeous pink skinned, teal-haired Cara.
I tried to force him to get back with her with MC. It was unfixable.
Juno: Did you hear? Someone actually likes Cora!
Arie: Oh, good! That means she can leave soon?
Not until she is a young adult, of course.
Cora: That's all I have to do before I can leave the place where everyone hates me? Oh, okay.
Cora: Whabam! Set up the alter, Terrible Family.
The alter and the canvas. You need a portrait before you can leave.
Arie: A portrait you say? I'm on it.
And then Cora makes the mistake of complaining about Arie RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER LOL. No wonder everyone hates Cora.
Arie: Is that so, mandatorily had offspring? This is what I think of you.
Arie: Blob monster ghost. Because you are dead to me. And also you're ugly.
It was about around this time that Simon found, yet again, another frumpy townie to start dating.
So I gave her a make-over and got SUPER EXCITED because she's so pretty!
HAHAHAHA. nope.
That was when Hearts lost her mind. She called in for reinforcements. And one lovely lady stepped out from the crowd to take on the challenge that is Simon Eterna. A rocker girl with the unexpected dream of wrangling this giant idiot:
Kamela Walker.
Kamela: Oh, what is this nightmare I have become a part of? What have I done?
You poor thing. You really didn't think this through, did you?