Chapter 2: Epic Training MontageKelsey: Well, do you really think we'll be able to execute that plan with you in
this shape?
[epic training music starts]
Kelsey [singing]: Ice, ice, baby! Ice, ice, baby!
Iris: That's not what I'd call epic music.
Iris: Ow! Can't we try something easier?
Kelsey: Left hook, right hook, kick!
Iris: Do the hokey cokey and you turn around...
Kelsey: You're not taking it seriously!
* * * *
Sebastian: So, you see, I was just sort of there and she came up and punched me! What a welcome to this town!
Proprietor: Why have you come to Starlight Shores anyway? Don't tell me it's to seek fame on stage or screen, please. I get three of those in here even on a slow day.
Sebastian: Nope, I was kidnapped. By a force of Good. I assume. It can't be an Evil force because I'm Evil and why would they kidnap me? Unless of course they saw me as a threat to their Evil Empire. That could be it actually.
Proprietor: Okaaay. Backing away slowly.
Sebastian: Oh, but don't you want me to come and stay for the night? I could make it up to you...
Proprietor: No. Please leave my bar and don't come back.
* * * *
Iris: This is far more to my standard of athletic ability.
Kelsey: That'll do for the warm-up, now come back inside and we'll get on with the training.
Iris: WARM-UP?!
Kelsey: Come on, just fifty more and we'll up the weights.
Iris: Can't... might... explode... help... make it stop...
Kelsey: Don't go falling, you can't fall if there's a Shark after you can you!
Kelsey: Right, that's the cool down. How're you feeling/
[silence]
Kelsey: Iris?
[silence]
Kelsey: She's passed out. Excellent. What kind of a weakling have they sent me?
Kelsey: Now you've come to, I think we're ready to start this mission.
Iris: I want my watcher back. All she makes me do is sculpt but I want her back.
Kelsey: Don't be silly. We're going to defeat the Sharks.
Kelsey: According to my tracker, he's ten minutes down the road, in the men's toilets at Mick's Master Karaoke. Let's get the motorbikes and let's go.
Iris: We get motorbikes?! Awesome!
Kelsey: What good action show doesn't have motorbikes?
* * * *
Sebastian: So near, and yet so far. This is demeaning. I'm going to enter the rodeo bull competition and win my money for my train ticket back home to Alana, and I'm going to kill whoever got me here!
Sebastian: I need a new plan.
Iris: Target, marked.
Kelsey: Good work.
Iris: We've both turned into cliches now.
Kelsey: Let's just get on with it, come on.
Iris: I was kind of expecting a real shark.
Kelsey: You, Sebastian Shark, are Evil and out to take over the world!
Sebastian: And? Your problem?
Kelsey: I'm here to stop you, and save humanity!
Iris: Calm down here people, let's keep it calm.
Sebastian: Stop me? You? You couldn't if you tried.