Chapter 111 - Just Because I haven't slept, eaten, or used the bathroom in three days. In the basement below the basement, I can hear my parents having a grand old time, especially with the Sonic Bowling. Mom called up and told me that watching Dad bowl is extremely sexy. Which I
neither wanted nor needed to know!
They also do a lot of Woohooing, which Mom explained to me in great detail because . . . I don't know. I suppose she misses having Grandma to talk to, or something, since they call each other every night . . . but it's not really the same.
School is, to put it mildly, a drag. There are three other girls and one boy who isn't very good-looking or interesting, and even though I'm the most popular--that isn't saying much.
Dad always helps me out with my homework, because I don't pay a whole lot of attention in class. According to Grandma, I'm some kind of genius--just like her. Of course, she was an outcast in school, so I'm planning on being a very
quiet genius.
Prom rolled around, and--being a total knockout--I could have gotten a date just like
that. However, the only boy in school isn't all that handsome and uninteresting (and a babysitter to boot), and as much as I respect Grandma Kara's lifestyle I'm not interested in girls, so I went alone.
As it turns out, I actually enjoyed Prom! I won Queen (of course), and one of the babysitters spiked the punch bowl, which was a nice bonus. Then things started going awry when yet another teenage NPC, Sherrie, kissed me! I'd heard that Grandma Kara started down her road after a similar encounter at her Prom, so I
had to squash this relationship before the rumors started!
I called Sherrie up that night (the suit was Mom's idea--she says it's always easier to take bad news from a llama), but she refused to come over! Stupid stubborn NPC . . .
Mom and Dad were otherwise occupied for the rest of the evening, so I returned to my experiments. Science truly is fascinating--Grandma is the only one who truly understands the passion, the
drive! I want to discover anything and everything, unravel the universe and put it back together.
That night, a ghost appeared for the first time since his demise. He stood at the edge of the pond and gazed across the road, as if waiting for someone.
She heard him. She felt his presence. And she came.
With tears in her eyes, Iris Bianca went in for a kiss--only to find that Bubba pulled back. "
What is it?" She asked, shocked. "
Do you not want to see me? Is this a break-up visit?"
"
No, of course not! It's just that . . ." he hesitated for a moment "
I wasn't sure if we could touch."
She smiled, taking his ghostly hands in hers. "
Bubba! You should know that the ectoplasm that makes up ghosts is transparent and loosely formed, but the molecules are close enough together that the ectoplasm feels solid. Which means that I can do--"
"
--this."
After a long kiss, a kiss that took them both back many years, she released her husband and stepped back with a smile. The ghost stood, surprised, for just a moment, then took her hands in his.
I threw this incredible house party, just for the heck of it--and so that I could break it off with Sherrie. Of course, she went all psycho on me, which just goes to show that I should have worn the llama suit!
I left the psychotic babysitter behind and moved on to the average, boring babysitter who was also the only guy in school: David Dubois. He's not the most interesting chap, or the most receptive, but it was the best I could do at the time.
We flirted for a few minutes, then I decided it was time to take things to the next level.
You'd think he'd be
happy to have the prettiest, most popular girl in school kiss him, right? But no, David wants to
take things slow and
get to know each other! I wish he would just lighten up--I'm trying to have a fling, not get married!
I know that I can't have the relationship that my parents have, and, honestly, I don't want it! Not yet, anyway. After all of this is over, when I'm free to be married, I'll consider falling in love. Or not.
I want someone who I can ambush in the shower,
just because . . .
. . . Who will dance with me for hours, simply because we both will enjoy it . . .
. . . Who I'll love, and who will love me, for ever and ever.
