Yup! But we're not really focusing on that at the moment: now we're having a small intermission for interpersonal drama!
...Sometimes I feel like I write too densely, but I also feel like I'm not doing the characters justice if I don't save some time for little personal moments in this early days, when everything's new. I dunno.
Part 2.5: This One's About FeelingsFrom the Journal of Jaycen Hendrix (Updated Infrequently) Ok, boys and girls. Confession time. I do not get women.
They’re splendid, beautiful, amazing creatures. They are the greatest source of joy on this earth except maybe a really nice slide.
But they’re all completely crazy.
Jaycen never really ever learned many lessons about activities suitable for people living in houses made of the world’s thinnest glass.Wait, wait. Let me start at the beginning.
So one evening after I started this little vacation of mine started, I start feeling a little under the weather. Since I figured I wasn’t going to work tomorrow anyway, this was OK; I’d at least sound legit when I call in sick.
So I sit myself down on the rocking chair in Aurum’s study. She’s hard at work, so she’s not using it, and…
I get to watch her at work. And that’s. Wow. That’s something. Not all that bubbling vial stuff – that’s beyond me – but her expression. Like, I’ve seen her talk to people, and not smile. And she pets the cat, and she doesn’t smile. And she eats food, and she doesn’t smile. You become convinced that she is incapable of normal human emotions.
And then you see her work, and it’s crazy. She goes from this metal statue of a person to a benevolent goddess, full of love. Like, you see a picture of an angel or a saint, and that expression is a little bit sad and otherworldly, but it’s also graceful and tender, with a hint of a smile to it. That’s what this is: it’s a divine smile, getting teased out of her when she’s finally relaxed.
She doesn’t feel the need to talk if you don’t, or she’s working, so I just watch her…And…Maybe I nod off. For a second.
But when I wake up, she’s got this crazy metal probe in my mouth! She’s leaned forward close to me, and is looking at the big round thing at the end of it. I spit it out and it clatters across the room.
“What the plumbob are you doing? What is this crazy thing?”
She looks surprised.
”…It is a thermometer. It is normally used for taking the temperature of my solutions, but in this case, I applied it to you. You currently have a core temperature of 100.3. That is significantly higher than the standard deviation in temperature among humans.”“You don’t go shoving things in people’s mouths without their permission!”
”Yes, it is an unfortunately poor way of assessing core temperature.”“Not what I meant!”
She shrunk back.
”I…do not understand. Are you uninterested in matters of your health?”“What even gave you the idea to do that?”
”…You were shivering. I wished to know if it was best to remove you to bed or not.”Put like that, I stop putting up a fight. When I stand, I’m a bit dizzy from the flu…And then her arm’s linked around my back, and she’s helping me into bed.
”I will work up a medication. Perhaps some manner of soothing tonic…”She mutters as she moves off. I fall asleep right away.
And wake up to a phone call.
”It’s Lina.”Oh, joy. Women I particularly do not understand: Ladies you used to woohoo with. Everything’s going great until they’re all ‘do you love me, Jaycen?’ ‘Are you going to meet my parents, Jaycen?’ ‘Stop stealing my cushions to build couch-forts, Jaycen!’ Women. I swear. This particular girl’s the most recent, and, really, the chilliest with me. Here’s the skinny: she’s with a guy. A rich older guy named Eli, which means it’s all aboard the sugardaddy express in Lina Lancaster Land.
…Sure, you can say it’s scummy to snag another man’s girl… But it’s pretty scummy to be snagged by another man when you’re with someone, isn’t it? She got worried about her little charade of being love with her guy, so she we cut it off. No skin off my nose – not after I dated her mom, anyway. There’s a line of wildcats there.
That…Was actually an excellent recap. I thought I’d have more work to do. I’m impressed, Hendrix.But today…Lina sounds kind of panicked.
“I thought you weren’t going to call ‘ever, ever again, at least not unless I need to get out because I found a new sugardaddy.’”
”…Shut up, Jaycen! This is important for once, you goon!”There is, I swear, a solid minute of awkward silence.
“Well?”
”…I…I think I might be pregnant.”I cough from shock.
“What? How?”
”…How do you think, genius?” Ok, so that was kind of a dumb one. But…Come on!
“…And…And it’s mine?”
”I think so. Listen, just don’t tell Eli, alright?! I’ve got a good thing…And I don’t want you to wreck it. Don’t even give a hint. In fact, don’t even come by. My little one’ll have a daddy, even if it’s not her daddy. And he’ll probably do a better job of it than you, too.” Then she hangs up.
Harsh, girl. Harsh. Still…It’s not like I’m all that interested in raising a kid, anyway. And Lina’s great fun, but she’s also kind of…Uhh…Evil.
I get ambushed by
”What is your current temperature? I’ve whipped up a few excellent medicine ideas, though a first test ideally shouldn’t be on a human subject, ” I cut her off at the pass.
“Please, no, I’m fine.” Not exactly true, though, is it?
“ …Man, I’m just getting pelted with bad luck. First I get sick, and then it turns out I’m going to be a dad. It never rains, but it hails.”
”You’re going to be a father? What wonderful luck!” She gives me this bright, beaming smile. And then she starts talking practically a mile a minute. I almost think her voice has, like, tone and stuff.
”Will your offspring be a boy or a girl? Have you worked out custody arrangements with her mother, since they do – she does have a mother, correct? Because I have not seen sufficient supplies for –“I don’t even know how that sentence would have ended; I almost wish I hadn’t interrupted it.
Yeah, me too.“There is no custody.”
She stops.
”…None at all?”“Zip. Lina’s being a massive harpy…And there are some things we don’t agree on, so she’s all ‘No way am I letting you near the kid.’”
For a moment, Aurum looks like a small, lost child.
“So…She will not even allow her child to know its father? Your child will grow up without knowing you, Because Miss Lina has become a harpy?”“Basically.” I catch her expression, looking like she’s trying very hard not to show her own worry. “Hey, don’t get upset. I don’t really mind that much, if that’s the way it has to be.”
Her eyes go electric, and her posture changes to some sort of mad-scientist warrior.
”…But what if it isn’t? I’m sure there is the power in my alchemy to reverse her harpy-like condition. I am sure I can make such a concoction, one way or another, and allow her to permit you to meet the child one day. So please, please, do not abandon it.
The bond between a child and her father…Is a wonderful thing. Please, do not forsake your own.”She takes my hands in hers.
“…Well, if it’s possible…I guess I should, huh?”
I…Get the impression she didn’t understand what I meant, but…
”I will get to work. You will see; it will not hail at all.”Still, it’s cute to see that human side of her. To see someone get worked up for me, for once.
Man, what is up with me lately? I follow one girl on a crazy mission, and I end up…Watering plants in a sunny little garden. And kind of enjoying it. And, even if it’s just something to do because we are seriously lacking in the fun department, I’m not minding the sculpting.
Still, it’s nice to have something cool to do while I think of my next move. Do I move on Aurum, or go home, or go back to work, or get a different, less lame job? Gotta plan my steps.
That Dreamer guy who moved in is a step ahead of me there: he’s decided to be an architect. I certainly don’t mind the discount – maybe I can get a new car on the cheap since he’s at it.
And Aurum’s…Trying some weird potions she’s making on herself.
She’s not…seriously…thinking that Lina’s actually, literally a harpy, right?
No one would do that, unless I guess they were raised in a cabin in the woods by a crazy but benevolent scientist or something.
Hendrix occasionally displays an oddly exact level of insight. Where this goes in his self-analysis…I have my theories, first of which being that Jaycen’s personality, cultivated over the years, leaves little room for introspection. Or maybe stopped clocks can be right twice a day.Because I really hope that’s not anti-harpy potion she’s trying out. Or what if it’s actually harpy potion, so she can cure it? Wait, Aurum, no!
Of course, by the time I get the chance to ask… She’s throwing stuff at me!
“Ok, Aurum. What the plumbob was
that?” I say that, but, you know…I feel much better. Like, energized.
”It is an invigorating potion. Two parts of aqua vitae to one-point-three parts Wolfsbane seed-pods, crushed and blended with [redacted as before– Your Editor. I thought you might enjoy additional…And…It’s to thank you, for your assistance.”“Oh, don’t worry about it, Aurum. I don’t do anything if I don’t want to do it – that’s the Hendrix way!... I’m glad to help you; you kind of looked like you needed it.”
She nods in agreement.
”Then I shall return to my study. Have a good evening, Jaycen.”…She really is a sweet girl, even if she is odd. Maybe what she said earlier is still in my head.
Because I find myself reading a book about childrearing, just in case... I mean, if someone could actually make Lina come around…It’d probably be Aurum.