His question and proposal circled my mind. It left me awake all night, my eyes refusing to close except for a blink. "Why do we have to leave?" I asks myself again. I guess I'm happy here, somewhat at least. But I need to know if my mother is okay. Even though my mother wasn't always there for me, I still love her. I need to find her, but what will I say to her. The last time, before I left. I hugged her, and left. I wish I had said more, because as the taxi drove away, I saw in her eyes, regret, it shone as bright as a street lamp. They pleaded for me to forgive and forget, but I looked away. I looked away. I should have called her, told her I love her and I don't hold it against her. But that would be a lie, because sometimes I do say it's her fault. But I would never tell her that, she's too fragile, she would break and never put herself back together. "Why did I leave?" I cry into my pillow. But I know the answer. I couldn't stand another day trying to figure out if my mother was a tree or a fallen stick, if when I came home she would smile or cry. It was just too much. But... What ever is out there, whether it be human or animal or other, scares me half to death. What will we do once we leave? Which direction? How? With what? I need answers, that's pretty much all that I know is true. I crept our of bed, and will myself to go forward. It would be easy for me to go back to bed, pretend Warren never asked me to leave with him. Or I can keep going, and possible escape this nightmare, I keep moving.
It's dark, of course it's dark. It's been dark outside, day and night for ten days now. The carpet muffles my steps, it's a good thing it does. Because if I heard them I would scare myself.
I stand outside the boys room door. Silently, the door opens. THe soft sound of snores vibrate in the room. Each step I take, means less time to change my mind. Too late any way. Warrens awake. His eyes reflect the small light from the space between the door and the frame. When he sees me a small smile forms, he starts to climb down from the top bunk. When he reaches the ground, he gently puts his arm around my shoulder and leads me outside the room. He sits in the place that he sat the first time he talked to me, and so do I. But this time I ask the questions, not him. "When would we leave?" I ask him. He looks off to a distant point, off in the darkness. "A day after tomorrow, at night. When everyone is asleep." He replies. "What would we bring with us?" He thinks about my question, I watch as he frowns slightly. The crease in-between his eyebrows grow deeper, his eyes narrow and he taps his foot lightly. "Well, we need food and water of course, non perishables would be better. Who knows the whether, a variety of clothing. Flashlights, and a bag to carry it all." I nod, "Aren't you afraid?" I ask, I stare up into in gray eyes. Eyes that feel like that could melt me, and I couldn't even protest if they did. "Well," he says. "I could be afraid, or I could think of it as just something I have to do." I admire his bravery, it makes me feel like I should be braver. But I know I can't. "Are you afraid?" He ask, "His stare is going to melt me." I tell myself, "i'll be nothing more." Then I nod. 'Yes," I admit, "I am afraid. I'm not brave." "You are brave, though." He tells me. "You are braver then you think." "Why do you like me?" I suddenly blurt out. "Why Hailey?" I scream at myself. "Why did you ask that?"I just went and ruined everything. My face falls and I turn away from him, I want to melt away, to disappear and never be found again. An endless game of hide and seek, without the need for seek. He puts his hand on my shoulder, it just makes me stiffer.
"Hailey," he says gently. "Hailey!" I don't answer him, I can't look at his face. "Hailey, I love you because you are you. You don't try to be someone else. Remember that day in math class. I looked behind me, and I caught your eyes, but you looked down. That was when I truly realized that you were prettier then anyone else I had ever none and would ever see. You surprised me, you were..different. I don't know much about the old Hailey, but I tell you I like the new one, the one you are now." I felt myself filling with joy. I turned back to face him, "Really? All of what you said is true?' He smiles, he smile says it all. We are leaving, a day from tomorrow, at night. When everyone else is asleep.
Hope you liked the new update! I don't know when the next update will be, because I will have pictures in the next one. I need to stage them out and Hailey and Warren need time to get ready. So, do you think it was the right chose to leave, or should they have thought it through more and stayed?
