Author Topic: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty [COMPLETE]  (Read 232051 times)

Offline FrancescaFiori

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #555 on: March 27, 2017, 02:52:12 PM »
@oshizu I'm so happy you liked it! If you were a fan of the last chapter, this one should be right up your alley. :) I have to agree about Cressida and Thaddeus, they are really just male and female versions of each other.

@wfgodot Thank you! I'm glad you appreciated my costume decisions and set-up. :) I just figured these guys going on a spy mission would definitely have their own Spiffendale-y way of going about it. Mallory's trial wasn't going to involve a hot tub . . . but it is now! Thanks for the idea!
I took so many shots of the cowplants because seeing them all together was so funny to me.
And, yes, cheats are so fun!

@MarianT Thank you! I'm so glad you like it. Next trail coming up!

@Alex I had a blast setting everything up. It's been a real challenge trying to manipulate objects that exist in game to serve the purposes I need (like the boom cube/ice block), but it's been so fun! Definitely a departure from my usual style, but crazy fun nonetheless.

II:  Shokugeki



Morris:  Oooh! Mushrooms! Nice! These are pretty rare, too! I’ve never seen this variety in Newcrest.



Morris:  Carrots! Don’t mind if I do! I mean, I suppose the abundance of quality produce in my particular section of this hedge maze could be simply a ruse to lead me around in circles and down blind alleys, but . . . eh.



Morris:  Okay, a little cloudgaze to top up my inspiration. I have to say, so far this haunted mansion business has been downright pleasant. *sigh* Okay, then. Time to head in!



Morris:  Honey, I’m-WHOA! WHAT? So many lights! Is this a reality show? What's going on?



Ghost:  SHOKUGEKI!!!!!



Morris:  Shoku-whatnow?



Ghost:  Morris Spiffendale! I, J Huntington the First, the Original, do hereby challenge you to the ultimate cooking battle! We will compete, head-to-head, in this very kitchen stadium. If you are victorious, you may pass though the door on the other side . . .

Morris:  Okay, not that I’m admitting this as even a remote possibility, but what happens if you win?

J the First:  You will give me the recipe for ambrosia.

Morris:  Oh. Okay.

J the First:  And also you fail the quest you and your entire family have been working towards all of your lives.



Morris:  Hmmm . . . yeah, still okay. I’m on board. Rules? Theme? Theme ingredients?



J the First:  Oh-ho-ho, yes! The key to the theme of this competition lies within this very box! For this challenge, you must use the ingredients contained in this room to create the most glorious, the most transcendent, the very apotheosis of my favorite dish. And that dish is . . .

Morris:  Please don’t say fish tacos. Please don’t say fish tacos. Please don’t say fish tacos . . .



J the First:  FISH TACOOOOOOOOOS!

Morris:  *Groans* Honestly, the one recipe in the universe for which I have completely run out of ideas. All right, who’s judging this farce, anyway?



J the First:  Ah, yes. I saved the best part for last. You see, we have managed to engage the masterful skills and unequaled palate of the greatest food critic to ever practice the profession . . .

Morris:  You want me to judge the competition myself?  I mean, that hardly seems fair to you, but I certainly admire your taste.

J the First:  No, no, no! It’s Geeta Rasoya!

Morris:  But she hates my guts!

J the First:  Exactly!



Other Ghost:  Umm, actually J, there’s something I forgot to tell you.

J the First:  What is it, J? This is hardly the time! I’m busy gloating!

Morris:  Wait, you’re both named J? That’s confusing.

J the First:  *sigh* No. I’m J the first, and my son over there is J Jr.

Other Ghost:  My name is actually Jeffrey, but I go by J. It’s just simpler.

Morris:  Is it? Because it seems like . . .

J the First:  Enough introductions! J, what happened to Ms. Rasoya?

J(effrey):  Well, something came up at the last minute and she couldn’t make it. But we’ve found a replacement, and I think he’s even better!



Cressida:  Sorry, Geeta, dear. You’re going to have to come with me.

Geeta:  Mmmph! But my revenge!

Cressida:  Yeah, yeah. Another time, honey.

**********************

J the First:  But who could you possibly have found at the last minute who’s worthy of judging this Shokugeki? Did you even get a writing sample?

J(effrey):  Oh, yes! His work is positively scathing! He’s even meaner than Geeta. Granted, his specialty is mainly art, but he’s got a great deal of experience with food as well. Julian vetted him earlier today. He says he’s great!

J the First:  Well, what’s his name?

J(effrey):  They call him . . . El Lobo.



Julian:  I can’t tell you how much we appreciate you stepping in like this, Diego. You really saved our necks.

Diego:  Please. It’s entirely my pleasure.



J the First:  Lovely to meet you, El Lobo. Welcome aboard!

Morris:  So . . . you guys don’t read the forum, then, huh?

Diego:  Hush, Morris. No one wants to hear about your absurd little life story right now.

J(effrey):  See? Totally mean! He’s going to be great!

Diego:  Totally mean, with exquisite taste. Now, let’s get this Shokugeki underway!



*Shing!* *Fwoosh!* *Rapapappapapa!* *and other exciting cooking noises*



Diego:  ENOUGH! The time period has elapsed. Please present your final dishes for inspection. J the First, you are . . . first. What have you prepared for me?



J the First:  I have used the finest and most expensive quality ingredients as well as the most revolutionary new gastronomic techniques to prepare for you a dish so delicious its flavor cannot be contained within this galaxy. I give you . . . .the space taco!

Diego:  *bites* Ah, yes. I taste the flavors of the sea and the sky. I feel as though I am wading out into the ocean . . .



Diego:  And yet, as the water laps playfully about my feet, and a wave rushes to engulf me . . . I remember I still have my cell phone in my pocket.

J the First:  Huh?

Diego:  I’m sorry, J. While your dish truly reaches the pinnacle of technique and innovation, I’m afraid I find it ultimately disappointing.

J the First:  But . . . but .. .



Diego:  Eating this, I feel like a dinosaur descending into a tar pit, melancholy with the knowledge that archaeologists will ultimately misinterpret my awkward pose.

J the First:  That’s . . . quite the esoteric metaphor*. I’m not exactly sure how to argue with that.

Diego:  Indeed, you shouldn’t try. Please bring me the next dish. Morris, what do you have to present?



Morris:  I offer you the humble taquito.

J the First:  *scoffs* Taquitos?  Surely you must be joking.

Morris:  I elevated this usually pedestrian, often frozen, snack treat to a higher level of deliciousness and exotic flavor through the introduction of my personal favorite fish, halibut. I fried it in the most delicate grapeseed oil to avoid introducing any extraneous flavors, and crisped the shell with sea salt I gathered myself from the Windenburg Bay. Also, I chopped up that cactus from the entryway to this room and pickled it to use as garnish.

Diego:  Genius!

J the First:  What?



Diego:  Eating this, I feel reborn. This is not a taco. It is my mother, and I love her.

Morris:  Whoa! Diego! I appreciate the compliment, but maybe there’s no particular reason to disrobe right now.

Diego:  Nonsense, Morris. I’m not really naked, My nudity is metaphorical, symbolizing the ecstasy of my return to infancy through your cooking.

Morris:  Okay. Looks pretty literal to me, but I think this means I won, so I won’t argue with you.



J the First:  I do not accept this! It’s preposterous! I will not be beaten by taquitos! Let me taste them!

Morris:  By all means, go ahead!



J the First:  *Gasps* It’s true! It’s true! The flavors really do complete me and enable me to express my true, undisguised self! I am biting into a cactus, but instead of spikes . . . STARS! Morris Spiffendale, you are a true culinary master. I concede your victory, and allow you to pass!



Morris:  *burps* Oh, excuse me. Hey, guys! Well, that was almost too easy. I feel a bit insulted, to tell you the truth.

Arianna:  Oh, Morris. Let’s not look our gift horse in the mouth, okay?

Morris:  As you say, Mother. When’s everybody else getting here?

J:  Soon enough, Morris. Soon enough.

*esoteric metaphors courtesy of Mr. Fiori. :)

Online sdhoey

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #556 on: March 27, 2017, 03:03:11 PM »
OMG!!! That was great! *claps!!* BRavo Morris



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Offline MarianT

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #557 on: March 27, 2017, 03:09:56 PM »
Tell Mr. Fiori his esoteric metaphors are lovely! I particularly like the dinosaur descending into the tar pit. Ah, Diego and Morris, I'm going to miss you so much!
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Offline oshizu

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #558 on: March 27, 2017, 03:58:09 PM »
FrancescaFiori, I think this food battle brings together--in the most exquisite, perfect, ultimate form--all of your various experiences as a simmer, food blogger, and (more recently) a fan of "Food Wars."
What a howl! I giggled, smiled, and laughed all the way through it. And thank you Mr. Fiori for the tar pit prose--did you instruct the Missus in the design of that image as well?

It was the perfect trial for Morris! And Cressida kidnapping Geeta to allow Diego to judge---what a genius move!

Offline wfgodot

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #559 on: March 27, 2017, 04:49:43 PM »
Oh man, Morris is so adorable gathering all the produce from the maze.  Not nervous or scared or anything!  Just his usual sophisticated self, even with the spare time to cloudgaze lol.

I really liked the former J's!  Especially the goofy face J the 1st greeted him with when he walked through the door.  Loved all the fish corpses and taco bits lying all over the table, haha.
It's so wonderful how Diego came through for Morris!  ahhhh...  And of course, Cressida's appearance.  Perfect.  I've been on the fence about her sometimes, but I definitely like her now.

Okay Sir Fiori.  First of all I couldn't stop giggling over the idea of a dinosaur feeling melancholy at all - and yet doing so as he (willingly??) descends into this tar pit.  LOL!  They do manage to die in the most awkward poses, don't they.

Diego, metaphorically reborn.  Oh goodness.  And standing there nude, too.

I'm glad Morris beat this fellow with his more common take on the dish.  Mom beats out the melancholy dinosaur.  Sorry J1.
Morris, offended it wasn't more challenging :)
Nice chapter, I loved it.
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Offline Alex

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #560 on: March 27, 2017, 05:33:25 PM »
Must add my admiration for the tar pit line, but my favourite part was, "And yet, as the water laps playfully about my feet, and a wave rushes to engulf me . . . I remember I still have my cell phone in my pocket." That, and J the First's eyes in his first screenshot.

Not so sure about the cactus garnish, though :o ;D

Offline FrancescaFiori

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #561 on: April 05, 2017, 12:22:59 PM »
Whew! Sorry for the long delay, guys. Everyone in my house got sick, and then one of us turned five years old and it was all a big mess. I'm back now, though! Let's do this!

@sdhoey Heehee. I'm so glad you liked it!

@MarianT Mr. Fiori was very tickled to know his metaphors went over so well. :) I miss Morris and Diego already, too.

@oshizu Thank you for that eloquent, glowing review! :) Mr. Fiori got no say in the image accompaniments, unfortunately, being mostly unacquainted with the Sims and its artistic limitations. Had to find a way to let Cressida help, of course. She's really coming in handy.

@wfgodot Thank you! The former J's are all CAS-generated siblings of J Huntington III. I could have aged them down one by one and made them actually be the eight preceding generations of Huntingtons, but I was far too lazy. :)
I'm glad Cressida has finally managed to win you over.
Sir Fiori is very happy you enjoyed his tar pit metaphor, and that you gave it so much thought.
Diego being nude had to happen because that's the part of Food Wars that I find the silliest. Whenever anyone eats anything good their clothes fly off and they make ecstatic poses. You know, mentally. ;) It's hilarious!

@Alex So glad you liked the metaphors! I had so much fun taking the screenshots to get the right expressions. I have so many extras of Morris making various confused or shocked faces. I could make an entire chapter out of just that.
I'm telling you, pickled nopales are a thing! :)

III:  Salt in the Wound



Mallory:  Okay, then. The way is completely blocked by a pond. Honestly, the second I achieve resurrection it would be more convenient to be a ghost. Typical.



Mallory:  Well, I guess I’ll fish, then. Since there’s literally nothing else to do.



Mallory:  Nice! A tuna! Oh, and a rock appeared. Money! Ten or so more of these beautiful babies and I’ll be across.Yes, you are beautiful, aren’t you? I’m saving you for later!



Mallory:  And made it across. Check.



Mallory:  Ooof. But I am not feeling too great. I hope whatever goes on in there isn’t too strenuous because I definitely feel a cold coming on. That never ends well for me.



Mallory:  So . . . an easel. And a blank white room, utterly devoid of inspiration. Also notably absent:  any way out of this room other than the way I came in. Well, doing the only thing possible worked for me last time, so let’s go with that again. Time to paint! How am I doing, creepy ghost relatives? Do you have any requests? I specialize in fish, but I’m not bad at portraits. Anyone? Anyone . . . ?



Mallory:  Absent any input from the peanut gallery, I’m just going to go ahead and paint what I wish were here to inspire me. My sweet husband. Feeling flirty. Let’s make you a nice pink, shall we, Lucian?



Lucian:  TADA! Hey, girl. Nice work.

Mallory:  Eh. I’m a little rusty. I overshot on the pink and made you playful, but that’s okay. It’s still a darn good likeness.



Lucian:  You know I’m perfectly willing to change colors for you a a moment’s notice. You want to go for flirty pink?

Mallory:  So much. You have no idea how much, but I’m actually kind of in the middle of something, and I’ve just discovered I have the ability to summon whatever and whomever I want just by painting my desires. Something tells me I ought to focus on the task at hand.



Lucian:  You sure you don’t want to paint a bed?

Mallory:  *giggles* Nah, I think I’m going to have to go with a door, but if I get that right I'm sure there will be time for beds later on.



Lucian:  Oooh. That’s a nice one. I wouldn’t have anticipated the stripes. I like.

Mallory:  Yeah, well. No sense in wasting an opportunity. This room is positively crying out for a pop of color.



Mallory:  And thar she blows. The way is clear. Thanks for keeping me company, sweetie. It’s been too long.

Lucian:  You’re telling me. I’m just saying,  you could almost certainly paint a bush in that corner, or a nice closet on that blank wall. Manifesting your desires is not an opportunity to be wasted.

Cressida:  Hey, guys! Sorry to break up the party, but I’m going to need to talk to Grandma Mal for a sec.

Lucian:  *sigh* Oh, well. It was worth a shot.



Mallory:  So you’re Gen 9, huh? What a joy to finally meet you!

Cressida:  Yeah, it’s neat. Whatever. Thanks for dying so that I could exist. We can catch up later, though. I’m here to prepare you for what’s on the other side of that door you just created, and I’m afraid it’s not going to be pleasant.



Mallory:  Oh, gosh. Okay. Clue me in. I can take it.

Cressida:  Oh, I’m not going to tell you. My job is to subtly debase you so that you’ll be so sad that nothing on the other side of that door will even matter.

Mallory:  *gulp* That sounds . . . pretty awful.

Cressida:  Pretty awful doesn’t even begin to describe what I’m about to say to you. Ready? Here goes . . .

*several minutes later*



Mallory:  No. Please, stop. I’m so miserable I don’t think I’ll ever be happy again. I wish I’d stayed dead.

Lucian:  Takin’ it like a champ, baby! Good for you! That’s my girl!

Cressida:  Stop encouraging her. She needs to be sad. Okay, Grandma Mal, you ready?

Mallory:  Maybe. Maybe not. Who cares? Who cares about anything?

Cressida:  Perfect! Through the door with you!

Lucian:  See you on the other side, sweetie!



Mallory:  Okay this . . . . is just mean. Do you hear me, creepy ghost relatives? This is salt in a still very fresh wound! Honestly! It’s also a plot hole, because it shows you do read the forum, after all. Jerks.

Cressida:  Think sad thoughts, Grandma Mal!

Mallory:  Not a problem.



Mallory:  Ah, yes. Make it so I have to get in the hot tub to get across the room. Very nice.



Mallory:  And what is that aroma I detect?  A little playful peppermint, perhaps? I’d know it anywhere, since it was the last thing I smelled before collapsing dead on the stones of the patio. Okay then, sad thoughts. Not sarcastic, vengeful thoughts. That will be the real challenge.



Mallory:  Death. Forgotten birthdays. Mourning. The Tragic Clown. Breakups.



Mallory:  Barber’s Adagio. The Little Match Girl. That face Simba makes in The Lion King as he’s watching his father be trampled by wildebeests. Donating to a fake charity. The future cube.



Mallory:  And, we’re out.

Morris:  Mallory! Congratulations! You look . . . miserable . . . or are you giggling? I’m very confused by the expressions doing battle on your face right now.

Mallory:  I’m currently plus 50 sad, but I’ve just battled my way through a veritable forest of playful auras, so I’d appreciate it if nobody did or said anything funny right now, just in case.



Wendell:  *bursting through door* OMG! EVERYBODY RUN!

Mallory:  Oh, perfect.

Morris:  What happened to you?

Wendell:  You don’t want to know, Grampa Morris. You don’t even want to know!



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Offline MarianT

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #562 on: April 05, 2017, 01:05:25 PM »
Ooh, cliffhanger! Poor Mallory, what a terrible reminder of her passing! Great stuff.
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Online sdhoey

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #563 on: April 05, 2017, 01:08:09 PM »
Poor Mallory, having to relive that.

My poor poor Wendell. What have you done to him?

Offline Caterina

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #564 on: April 05, 2017, 01:19:48 PM »
I wanna know!

I am really enjoying your after story.  You are very clever.

Your comment about one of you turning five made me giggle.

Offline wfgodot

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #565 on: April 05, 2017, 02:11:30 PM »
I really liked Mallory's challenges!  Really clever how she had to get across the pond, and how to get through that room.  I love the way she figured out the room - by first bringing Lucian to her.  Also, the strict colors depicting what mood he should be in made me laugh.  Oops, accidentally a little playful!  Lucian is so wonderful with his bed comment, and his encouragement after Cressida shows up trying to make her sad!

It's really clever how she had to be so sad, and keep all the sad things in mind, to get through the playful aura of the hot tub.  Yup, I thought I might even cry by the time she made it out of there.  I had to go look up Barber's Adagio.  Pretty interesting, all the places/bad events it has been played at.

Morris's confusion over her facial expressions!  So funny. 
And of course, Wendell.  Goodness!!!!   Looks like he had a rough go!  Perfect timing, though!  His expression is perfect!!! 
Hot dog suit!  Hot dog suit!
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Offline oshizu

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #566 on: April 05, 2017, 03:10:02 PM »
And the first scenes bust out the Bustamente nose! It's been so long since we last saw Lucian, it seems!

I love how each trial is so intimately tied to each family member's personality or life.
Cressida's turning out to look like a real champ in these trials.
"Thanks for dying so I could exist." rofl

Is Wendell's trial going to play like one of those "Try not to laugh..." Youtube videos?
I can't wait! Tell Mr. Fiori that we're all expecting him to go all out with the hot dog jokes!!!

Offline FrancescaFiori

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #567 on: April 07, 2017, 06:21:33 PM »
@MarianT Thanks! I felt a little mean putting Mallory through that, but it think it worked. :)

@sdhoey Hehehe. More Wendell than anyone can handle coming right up! (Don't worry. He'll recover. But will we?)

@Caterina So glad you're enjoying it! Answers incoming. And yes, I'm not sure which one of us it was turning five, anymore. I'm pretty certain it wasn't me, but sometimes I wonder. :)

@wfgodot Leave it to you to point out all my favorite details. Thanks! My orchestra in high school played Barber's Adagio, and I fell deeply in love with it. Super sad, though!
So much more hot dog suit awaits you!

@oshizu I've missed Lucian, too! He didn't visit much, so it was fun to have a chance to bring him back. Honestly, Mr. Fiori sent me almost a hundred hot dog jokes the first time. I think it was literally ninety-something. I cherry-picked my favorites for the first hot dog post. As for the rest of them, well . . .

IV:  Too Hot to Handle

Previously, on the Spiffelogue . . .



Wendell:  OMG! EVERYBODY RUN!


*several hours earlier*



Wendell:  Well, first things first. Enough of this charade of me being incognito. When Wendell Spiffendale makes an entrance, everybody is going to jolly well see him coming!



Wendell:  Now that’s more like it! Hey, nobody in particular, what’s the difference between a hot dog and a hot man? In this case, nothing! That’s right! You heard me! Work it, Wendell Dog! Speaking of which, let’s see what Wendell Dog is working with.



Wendell: Oooh. Quite the jumping club scene here at the Haunted Mansion of Doom. Who knew?



Wendell:  Pretty intimidating bouncer, too. Handsome fellow, though. Looks somehow familiar. I wonder if he likes hot dog jokes. What a silly question! Of course he does! Everyone loves hot dog jokes!



Wendell:  Okay, time for action. Wendell Dog does not wait in lines. Hey, everybody! Want to hear a lullaby?



Wendell:  Nice! Works like a charm! Now for a chat with Mr. Handsome Shadesalot.



Wendell:  Ay!

Bouncer:   . . . ?

Wendell:  Nice sunglasses, bro. Say, do you know why the clown painted his face like a hot dog?

Bouncer:  No.

Wendell:  He didn't! You're looking at a hot dog!



Bouncer:  Look, dude. Sorry. You’re not on the list.

Wendell:  That’s surprising, since I’m pretty sure this entire building was created just for me. I’d ask you to take another look, but I think that “list” is exactly one person long so it’s unlikely you’d have missed my name. You have a really amazing nose, by the way.



Wendell: . . . . Wait a minute . . . Brodie?



Brodie:  Heh heh heh! Gotcha! Good to see you, Dad.

Wendell:  Oh, holy smokes! You really had me going there. How’s your mom, kiddo? How did you even land this gig?

Brodie:  Oh, you know. Genetics don’t really carry over in CAS, so nothing turned up on my background check. They have no idea who I am. Mom’s good. She’s not pregnant for once. She says hi. She’s definitely itching for a visit from the Hug Patrol, though.

Wendell:  Well, the Hug Patrol will just have to make time to swing by. I’ve got to take care a  few things first, though. Am I good to go in?

Brodie:  Oh, yeah. Totally. Right this way.



Wendell:  Selfie for the road! Say wienerschnizel!

Brodie:  Wienershnitzel!

Wendell:  Okay, see you soon, son. Give Ruby and the Behrens my love. Oh, and btdubs, the Spiffen branch of the family isn't aware of the Hug Patrol's little detour with your mom, so if we could keep that on the dl for the moment . . .?

Brodie:  You got it!



Wendell:  Oh, hey. What do you know? A hot dog walks into a bar. Well, that’s far too good a set-up not to take advantage of!



Wendell:  Oooh! Popcorn! Hey lady, you ever seen an impossible sausage mime being performed by an impossible sausage?

Julene Huntington:  Oh boy. It’s going to be a long night.



Wendell:  Question:  Why do people put sliced hot dogs in macaroni and cheese?

Julene:  Presumably because whole hot dogs would be awkward.

Wendell:  Oh, I see this isn’t your first hot dog rodeo. Well, *cracks knuckles* let’s get warmed up, shall we? Why don't we shove wieners up our noses?

Julene:  Is that a suggestion?

Wendell:  Has a hot dog ever asked how old you are?

Julene:  No, not until now. When do the jokes start?

Wendell:  Several lines ago. Keep up. How many American presidents ate hot dogs?

Julene:  How many?

Wendell:  At least three.  Probably. How can you measure the shortest distance between two points?

Julene:  How?

Wendell:  Well, I suppose you could measure it in hot dogs, but that seems silly. Let's keep rolling! Where do hot dogs come from?
 
Julene:  Where?

Wendell:  The same place as dogs, only hotter.

Julene: *yawn* Are you done failing yet? I'm starting to feel embarrassed for you.

Wendell:  I have not yet begun to fail!



Wendell:  What is the difference between a hot dog and a banana?

Julene:  What?
 
Wendell:  Plenty.  Have you ever tried to peel a hot dog? OOOOH! Somebody’s turning pink!
 
Julene:  You’re just so ridiculous! I don’t have a choice!
 
Wendell:  What is the difference between a banana and a hot dog?

Julene:  Didn’t we just cover that?
 
Wendell:  Have you ever tried to make a call on a hot dog?

Julene:  *giggling* What?

Wendell:  How much does it cost to buy hot dog stock?

Julene:  How much?
 
Wendell:  About $1.89 per gallon, but I don’t know what you would cook with it. What kind of a sweater does a hot dog wear?

Julene:  I don’t know.
 
Wendell:  It’s really more like a sock.

Julene:  That is not a joke! It’s not! So why am I laughing? ARGH!

Wendell:  Why do campers roast hot dogs over a fire?

Julene:  Why?
 
Wendell:  You ever try roasting a pie?
 
Julene:  Again. Not a joke. *snickers*
 
Wendell:  Okay, try this one:  Why do campers roast hot dogs over a fire?
 
Julene:  Why?

Wendell:  Because roasting them beside the fire is ineffective.

Julene:  I don’t know what’s worse, the fact that your jokes are so awful, or the fact that I’m laughing at them.
 
Wendell:  I don’t know which is worse, a man-eating hot dog or a hot man-eating dog.

Julene:  Both ideas are terrifying.

Wendell:  Two hot dogs leave Grand Central Station at 9:01 am, traveling in the same direction and at the same speed.  One goes five miles, and one goes ten.  Why?

Julene:  Math, now?
 
Wendell:  I’m sorry, I can’t answer that question. I ate your hot dog on the way here.

Julene: GET OUT!



Wendell:  You got it. Thanks for the popcorn!



Wendell:  Oh ho ho! Now this is more like it! They definitely saw me coming!



Wendell:  I assume you’re looking for a dance battle?

Julian:  Why else would I have brought my sickest moves?

Wendell:  But who will we get to spin for us?

Catherine:  On it, sweetie! Go shake that thing.



Wendell:  You give?

Julian:  Uhhhh . . . best of three?

Wendell:  Okay, but I’m whipping out the big guns.



Wendell:  It’s TOWEL TIME!

Julian:  I’m in trouble.



Wendell:  *backs it up*

Julian:  Um . . . this is uncomfortable for a number of reasons.

Wendell:  Don’t fight it, man. Just give in to the groove.

Julian:  I CAN’T! I WILL NEVER YIELD!



Catherine:  Honey, you’re doing great but check your six. You’ve got company.

Erika:  Leave me hanging, will you? I am not a loose end!

*EXPLOSION*



Wendell:  Time to go! Better put my protective suit back on. Rematch at the after party?

Julian:  I can live with that!



Erika:  YES! AHAHAHAHAHAA! CLOSURE! AHAAHAHAHHAAA!


Offline wfgodot

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #568 on: April 07, 2017, 08:24:14 PM »
Ah, Wendell, I know you've been waiting a really long time to bust out the old hot dog suit again!

The shot of all the passed out ghosts in the line is amazing.  It really made me laugh!

Brodie!  It's so good to see him actually have a life!  He makes a good bouncer.  His ever-pregnant mother misses him :)
I love how he passed his background check due to genetics not transferring in CAS!  Ha, clever!
Epic selfie! 

Oh Wendell!  My favorite joke was the sweater one!  Really cute.
It was fun to watch Julene become playful in spite of herself.

But by far, by far!  Even moreso than the selfie pic, my favorite is that one of Wendell tossing popcorn into his mouth as he finishes Julene off.  Look at it!  Haha!  He looks like a seal :)
Catching a fish.  No neck, thanks to the suit.  I could look at it all day and grin like an idiot the whole time.

Epic hot dog dance off!  But he definitely nailed it in the towel.  Especially backing up Julian.

Erika!  LOL
That definitely explains the panic on his face when he burst into the hall.  Look at that creepy smile!
Add "maice" on Origin.
Behren Blog

Offline oshizu

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Re: Top Secret: The Spiffendale *Unofficial* Immortal Dynasty
« Reply #569 on: April 07, 2017, 08:58:15 PM »
I recognized the Bustamente nose right away, but not the name Brodie. The adjective "ever-pregnant" seems to point to Ruby?

I cracked up at Wendell backing it up in his towel, rofl.
Fun chapter!
All the Wendell fans will be greatly pleased!