@MarianT Thank you! Yes, Tallulah is a very creative problem-solver.
@oshizu Thanks! Yeah, I had the worst luck ever with Otto's friends. These days the heirs are getting pretty much everything done by their adult birthdays so they've got three long weeks of nothing before ambrosia. I get impatient and start making them friends and then they all die or get culled. I'm going to try to restrain myself in future generations.
I'm curious about the suit colors, too. Mysteries of the Sims! Alas, the sharp black suit is short-lived.
@Caterina Otto and I both thank you! I like to speak on behalf of my digital entities, so feel free to congratulate them directly if you like.
I love Jorge, too. Truly his love is as deep as a gorge.
Chapter 80: Perfect Timing
Tallulah: I am going to throw the best corporate retreats anyone has ever conceived.
Tallulah: Heck yeah, mergers and acquisitions!
Karla: Stop that or I will literally kill you.
Otto: Awwww. Come on. Be cute with me.
Karla: Oh, okay, but only because the lighting is pretty right now.
Tallulah: Check and Mate. Speaking of mate, I’ve decided to put you on the short list of candidates for fathering my child.
Salim: Oh? And when will the final decision be made?
Tallulah: Well, not until after Mom dies, so we’re not under any sort of time pressure now, but I was thinking it might be fun to add an element of randomness to the whole thing, so I think I’m just going to Try for Baby three times in a row with three different candidates and see what happens. What do you think?
Salim: It makes about as much sense as anything you’ve ever done.
Tallulah: Right? I think it’s fitting.
Salim: Just as long as I’m your favorite boyfriend, I’m willing to go along with anything.
Tallulah: Oh, yes. Of course, darling. You’re my favorite.
Karla: Wow. Family dinner. This is weird.
Wendell: Yeah. If this were a legacy, we’d earn a point for this, I think, but it’s not so . . . can I go watch TV now?
Karla: Is it this awkwardly formal when you all eat ambrosia together?
Pernille: Oh, yeah. Easily.
Morris: I HIRED A BUTLER!
Everyone: . . .
Morris: Sorry, I’m just really excited.
Morris: There she is! There she is! I have to call Diego. I want him to come over and see.
Arianna: Salma. Welcome. We’re delighted to have you.
Salma: I’m delighted to be here, Ma’am. Please let me know if there’s anything I can do for you.
Arianna: Well, here’s the thing: We don’t want you to garden because Karla’s still trying to finish Freelance Botanist, and we don’t want you to cook because Morris’s food never spoils so he’s in charge of that . . .
Salma: It will be my pleasure to clean, fix things, and prepare drinks for you, Ma’am.
Arianna: Yes, well . . . Mallory does the fixing of broken things, we have a maid for cleaning, and Morris and Wendell are both very accomplished bartenders.
Salma: What is it you require of me, then, Ma’am?
Arianna: You’re here because it makes Morris happy to have a butler. So, if you could just stand around looking butler-y, that would be great. And, well . . .
Salma: Yes, ma’am?
Arianna: If you could find it within you to tolerate Morris’s constant critiques and incessant advice on how you could be doing your job better . . . that would be worth the price of your salary in itself.
Salma: I understand perfectly, Ma’am, and let me assure you that maintaining composure and equanimity during absolutely any circumstances comprises an entire year of training at the Windenburg Butlering Academy. It is the very core of the profession.
Arianna: That is so good to hear.
Morris: Honey, it’s amazing. You just ring a little bell, an actual bell, and she comes right over and does whatever you want.
Diego: Oh, I’m so getting one. How did we ever survive without butlers?
Morris: I have no idea!
Morris: Oh, Salma!
Salma: Yes, Sir. How may I assist you?
Morris: It doesn’t bug you that I rang this bell even though you’re standing right there?
Salma: Certainly not, Sir. I appreciate your direct communication as well as your eagerness to take advantage of my services.
Morris: That is just the neatest.
Salma: What was it you wanted, Sir?
Morris: I got so excited I forgot. Could you just hang out there for a second until it comes to me?
Salma: Of course. It would be my pleasure, Sir.
Morris: Every day of my life before today seems unbearably primitive.
Salma: Yes, Sir.
Otto: Hey! Let’s do Soul Mates, you down?
Karla: Yeah, okay. I don’t have anything else pressing going on.
Otto: We don’t have to do this in the cemetery, by the way. It actually seems a little gauche.
Karla: Nah. It’s a helpful reminder of the time pressure we’re under. I don’t mind.
Otto: Okay, then.
Salma: Ahhhh. That’s the stuff.
Salma: *splash, splash*
Salma: *tears up the dance floor* Well, I did list it on my resume.
Mallory: More graveyard dates, huh guys?
Otto: Yeah, I’m actually getting really fond of this place.
Karla: It definitely has the best landscaping of any spot on the property.
Mallory: Okay, guys. You do you.
Tallulah: Okay, Why are you chuckling?
Arianna: Oh, it’s nothing. You’ll find out in about six moves.
Tallulah: I swear, you are the only Sim ever to find chess hilarious.
Arianna: It gets funnier as the years pass.
Karla: Well, this was not perfect timing. I still have two aspirations left to finish. Is it really time?
Otto: Honey?
Salma: This is horrible! And on my day off, too!
Otto: Karla?
Tallulah: Hah! Take that! Grandma . . .? Why aren’t you congratulating me? That move was brilliant!
Arianna: Oh, sorry honey. Um, just don’t turn around until you’ve gained that next level okay?
Tallulah: Oh, did someone die?
Arianna: No . . . .?
*several moodlet solvers and some detox secrets later . . . *
Tallulah (knight in shining armor): Okay! Welcome to a very special meeting of Club Cosplay! Tonight’s the night! We’re going to conceive Generation Eight of the Spiffendale Dynasty! And one of you lucky masked fellows is going to be the father. Billie . . . we all appreciate your tribute to Carrie Fisher, but you can go home now.
Billie: I still maintain that we can make this work.
Tallulah: Look, I’m still a little cheesed off at you because your refusal to vote for anyone besides yourself and break the deadlock trashed my first plan for choosing my baby daddy democratically, so make like a tree, already.
Billie: That looks impossible.
Tallulah: Come on, Boba Fett, let’s go see if we can make a baby.
Tallulah: Oh, Rebel Pilot, care to accompany me to the tent?
Pilot: You betcha! I’m just making sure my hands are warm enough to touch your precious body.
Tallulah: Awww. How sweet are you? Come on, though. We’re on a tight schedule.
Pear-Shaped Pilot: Billie, for real. It’s not happening. Just go.
Billie: Oh, please. You’re pear-shaped, even in that costume. You’ve got as good a chance as I do.
Wendell: There’s a metaphor, here, I’m sure of it.
Boba Fett: I’m trying not to think about it.
Tallulah: I guess I should have known this night would get a little too hot.
Arianna: You good, Salma? You regretting working here yet?
Salma: Yes, this is a marvelous hamburger. Very well prepared.
Arianna: That’s not what I asked you.
Salma: De-licious!
