Chapter 54: Is Gilberto Immortal?
The Singhs arrive in Twinbrook and purchase a nice mansion in the rich district, near Sofia Carlton and the Rackets.
Patrick and Chasity immediately get working to try for a baby.
Patrick: I hope our baby's spuse doesn't turn out to be ugly. You know that this town is a bunch of Arlo Bunch mutants right?
Chasity: Be quiet, if the Waverlys turned out so pretty and well-written then so will we!
Patrick: That's because they had Bill Racket and Harwood Clay! Those two will die before we know them.
Chasity: Can we just woohoo now?
While they get busy, Esther goes to the porch to meet the welcome wagon.
Esther: Actually, I'm just hoping some hotties show up. Wait, EW! What is that thing?
Buck: I'm Buck Green. I can tell you're not from here.
Esther: Why?
Buck: Because you're super attractive and have clear skin. Juan Darer often screws up our genetics with his sunburns.
Esther: Aw, thanks! Wait, something smells like sewage.
Buck: ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF MY NOSE?
Esther: No, I'm serious.
Buck: Oh, that's just the Twinbrook smell. This place used to be a nuclear power plant wasteland.
Esther: So, THAT'S why everyone's so weird looking!
Buck: ..
Tonya: Why is no one on the bus?
Unseen Bus Driver: They all travel to school by boat. The swamps are very efficient.
Tonya: EW!
Patrick has the Avant-Garde trait so I decide to play around with the street art skill.
Chanel: What's that smell? It's smells like paint!
Patrick: I'm just tagging the wall.
Chanel: What's wrong with my family.
The first three days in Twinbrook fly by, the Singhs become adjusted to the swamps.
Tonya: Hey guys, can you help me with Geometry?
Esther and Gilberto: BOOKS BOOKS
Tonya: Um, guys?
Esther and Gilberto: BOOKS! BOOKS!
Tonya: Forget this, I'm working in the study.
"So, Tonya, met anyone at school?"
Tonya: I met some a donkey named Chase Bayless. This place is literally so gross. Jade Greenwood is cool though.
Chasity: Oh god, I see the Bayless family through the window. I feel sick.
"I'm not sure it's the Bayless family."
Chasity: BLEGH!
"Ew! Sim vomit!"
Chasity: Why do they have to have those ears?
Soon, Aaron's elder birthday arrives.
Esther: Yay! Go dad!
Gilberto: It's really disturbing how I'm 113 days old and still alive. My son is becoming a freaking elder. I feel so old.
Aaron: Here we go.
Chanel: That's my husband? That muscle shirt is hideous and so base game.
Aaron: Ew! Get me some new clothes! I look like I am from 2009.
Gilberto: Son, I'm really proud to see you grow through every step of the way. But please dye your hair because that's plain disturbing.
Aaron: Wow, thanks Dad..
Gilberto: I hope I don't die in this chapter.
At 113 days, Gilberto holds the record for the longest living Singh to date. Let's hope he can keep going?
I gave Aaron the same model of clothes but with different colors. They look so alike they could be brothers.
Patrick: Hey, honey, like my work outfit? Pink sweatpants with penny loafers are all the rage now.
Chasity: Can't talk, I just spun into pregnancy clothes.
Patrick: Honey, where are your pink sweatpants?
Esther: We've only been here a week and I'm sick of this place dad.
Gilberto: I'm your grandpa.
Esther: Oops. It's hard to tell you guys apart.
Patrick: I'm gonna spray paint the hallway outside of Chanel's room because she doesn't appreciate my art.
Tonya: I'm gonna paint on an easel since the city doesn't appreciate my art.
Patrick: Copycat
Esther: I'm gonna go to France since I can't tell my parents apart.
Esther: Oops, I'm in France.
"Let's go find an adventure!"
Esther: So, what is it you want me to do?
Margot: I lost my baseball in an ancient and dangerous tomb. Find it.
Esther: Seriously? I don't know what you French people do, but I'm not risking my life for a toy.
Margot: I've got cash.
Esther: Sign me up.
"Why are you touching that wall? It's just a wall."
Esther: Maybe she threw the baseball too hard and it went right through it. OW! Something pricked me.
"I think that was a switch."
Esther: URGH! Where are the handles on this thing? I've got freaking stones under my nails.
*Statue lands on switch unlocking door*
Esther: Who needs physics?
Esther: Oh thank god, another person. I was starting to go crazy. What are you doing down here?
Jolene: I'm playing soccer. We French people love playing sports in tombs. Even though it sometimes ets off traps and kills us.
Esther: Oh, that's totally normal. Have you seen a baseball anywhere?
Jolene: Yeah, Jean-Luc hit a home-run and it landed in that treasure chest.
Esther: You mean that obnoxious one over there?
Jolene: Oui.
Esther: That was easy. FREE MONEY!
Back at base camp, Esther meets an Egyptian bachelor
Esther: You know, I'm a super famous magician back home.
Youssef: That's so cool. Do you snake charm?
Esther: What's that? Wait, you got something on your lips, let me get it off.
Youssef: Wha-
We end this chapter with a kiss.
